| What did Cinderella say when her photographs weren’t ready?
Some day my prints will come.
|
Alex |
| If there is 5 fish in a fishtank 1 drowns how many are left?
5 because fish do not drown.
|
babygirl |
| What do you call a witch with a broken broom and her thumb up?
A witch-icher
|
stef |
| Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it was the chickens day off.
|
isaac pink |
| WHAT KIND OF CAR DOES A BULL HAVE?
A BULLDOZER
|
DENI |
Why did the football coach go to
the bank?
To get it’s quarterback
|
shorty |
| How did the dentist fix the dragons teeth?
With a fire drill.
|
nicole |
| What do you call a sleeping bull?
ANSWER: A bulldozer
|
yellow hummer |
| Where does the president keep in armies????
In his SLEEVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
Klunker |
| What’s a dogs favorite pizza topping?
Puperoni
|
Lea |
| A dear, a skunk and a duck go into a resturaunt. When it is time to pay,the dear didn’t have a buck, the skunk didn’t have a cent, so they put it on the ducks bill! |
Bookworm |
When is it a good time to go to the
dentist?
At tooth-hurty(2:30)
|
Gotinx |
| Q What is broken in your body when you go to Dr.Funny?
A Funny bone
|
Cheetah |
Why did the boy eat his
homework?
Because it was a piece of cake!
|
Sunny |
| Question:
What is black and white and black and white and black and white and green?
Answer:
3 zebras fighting over a pickle.
|
shanu |
Why did the elephant have a rotten
vacation?
Because he forgot his trunk!!!!!!
|
Spiro |
| What do bees use on their hair?
A honeycomb!
|
kenny |
| Mary’s mother has 4 kids. They are called North, South, and East.
What is the other childs name?
Mary
|
Sharon |
| Why did a girl through her clock out the window?
because she wanted to see time fly
|
bear bear be square |
| Why was the teacher cross eyed?
Because she couldn’t control her pupils!!!!!
|
lorene |
| Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
cuz he didn’t have the guts.
|
parralelparker |
| Why didn’t the orange cross the road!!
Because he ran out of juice.
|
Levi |
| What kind of water do you take on a plane?
Plain Water
|
master |
| What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye deer
|
Gilly |
| What do you call a old man watching the time?
An Old Timer!
|
Star |
| How do you make a kleenex dance!
Put a little boogy in it!
|
windal arndt |
| What kind of animal do you not want to play games with?
A cheetah!
|
Allie |
| When a surfer get’s married what does he say?
I Dude!
|
Goofy.L. |
| What do you get when you cross a wink with a happy face?
ANSWER: A ONE EYED SMILE!
|
eree |
| How do you say chocolate in french?
chocolate in french !! duhh
|
joey jaski’s baby girl 4 ever |
| What did one log say to the other log?
I’m burning up!
|
gold bug |
| Which Muppet is hard to see through?
kirmet the fog
|
liz |
| How Does A Witch Know how much money you have?
They can tell your fortune!
|
Lakota |
| What do you call a bull that sleeps?
A Bulldozer
|
Sam |
| Is your refrigerator running?
Then you better go catch it!
|
Sam |
| What did the duck say when his friend made him laugh?
You quack me up
|
LETY |
| Why did the dinasaur cross the road?
because the chicken wasn’t invented yet
|
dukeface |
| Why did the orange roll down the hill
because it ran out of juice!
|
grimesy |
| Why is cinderella not good at football?
Because she runs away from the ball
|
Natalie Grimes |
| If you had a million dollors and you were about to die what would you do?
buy a life saver!
|
joker prank |
| What did the ocean say to the shore?
Nothing, it just waved!
|
Ange |
| What do you where in winter that is cross between a sheep and a kangaroo?
A woolie jumper!
|
daffy dill |
Why did the class clown crawl
around the playground all night?
Because he lost his marbles!
|
brothers peltz |
| Question: What do you call a one story house?
Answer: A one story house
|
scampers |
| How do books comunicate?
They page each other!
|
roxy |
| What did the moster say when it was scared?
I want my mummy
|
RAHUL AND MEENA |
| Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
|
Delaney |
| What did one penny say to the other?
Lets get to gather and make some cents
|
baby princess angel 13 |
| Why did the Football coach go back to the bank?
He had to get his Quarterback.
|
Flower |
| Q. How did the skunk call home?
A. On his smellurlar phone!
|
blue |
| Question:Why did the dog cross the road?
Answer:’Cause he wanted to go to the barking lot!!!!!!!!!!
|
Chia340 |
| Q. what did the hamburger name has little girl?
A. patty
|
Rugrat |
| Q. Why did the catus cross the road?
A. Because it was stuck to the chicken.
|
Nicky M. |
| Q. What kind of a shark can build a house?
A. A hammerhead
|
Kolton |
| Q. What does one eye say to the other eye?
A. Between you and me something smells.
|
Asia |
| What time is it when your feet are raw?
Time to get shoes.
|
jessica |
| what did ernie say when bert asked him for some ice-cream?
‘sure,bert
|
brandlea10 |
where do people with no hair live?
in baldimore |
brandlea10 |
| IF CHUCKIE WERE A CAT WHAT KIND WOULD HE BE?
A SCAREDY CAT
|
PAIGE |
| Why does the light go out in the refrigerator?
So the tomato doesn’t see the salad dressing.
|
Jason |
| Question: What is worser than a giraffe with sore throat?
Answer: A caterpillar with sore feet!
|
Mia |
| Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he was feeling crummy.
|
Regicoscram |
| q. What plays piano keys?
Monkeys!
|
dj |
| Q. What goes up and never comes down?
A. Your Age
|
Missy |
| Q. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
A. Cause he didn’t have no body to go with.
|
Jacob and Jackie |
| Q. why did the lion spit out the clown?
A. because he tasted funny.
|
Dian |
| Q.Why was the baby ant confused?
A.Because all his uncles are ants.
|
Espier |
| Q. What is red, black and white all over.
A. A zebra with the chichen pox.
|
K.C |
| Q. What do you get when you cross an hippo with a black bird?
A. A lot of broken telephone poles.
|
Spitz(Stephanie) |
| Q:What starts with an E and ends with an E?
A:An Envolope
|
grandma |
| what is an alagators favorite drink?
gatorate
|
paul m |
| Q:WHAT CAN YOU SERVE BUT NEVER EAT
A:A VOLLEY BALL
|
CECE |
| Where did the sheep get a haircut?
At the Baaaarber shop.
|
Sel |
| what comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?
the letter m
|
ryan and andrew |
| why did the dragon’s house catch on fire?
because it slept with its mouth open.
|
sahar |
| WHAT IS RED, WHITE, BLACK, AND YELLOW?
a NEWSPAPER WITH KETCHUP ADN MUSTARD ON IT.
|
hello( you know) |
| WHAT IS BLACK, WHITE, BLUE, RED, ORANGE, YELLOW, PURPLE AND GREEN?
I DON’T KNOW, YOU FIGURE IT OUT!
|
HI |
| What time is it when a elephant sit’s on your fence?
answer:Time to get a new one.
|
May |
| Q:Have you heard the joke about the butter.
A:I can’t tell,you will spread it
|
KK |
| Q. Why does E.T. have such big eyes?
A. you would too,if you saw his phone bill
|
puffy hair |
| Q. Why was the calendar upset?
A. Because it didn’t have a date.
|
Manny |
| Q. What is the difference between a fly and a bird?
A. A bird can fly, but a fly can’t bird.
|
Manny |
| Q. Why was the letter «E» left back?
A. Because it was always in bed and never in school.
|
Manny |
| Isn’t there 18 letters in the alphabets?
Yes there is because E.T went into the U.F.O and the C.I.A. went after him!
|
Manny |
| Q. What is round on both sides and says hi in the middle?
A. Ohio.
|
Manny |
| Q. What day is worst for the chickens?
A. Fry-day.
|
Manny |
| Knock,Knock
Who’s there?
Banana
Banana Who?
Banana
Banana who?
orange
orange who?
orange you glad I didn’t say banana
|
Mandy |
| How many vampires does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Vampires prefer the dark.
|
Manny |
| What do clean noses have inside?
Fingerprints.
|
Akshay |
| Q. Why couldn’t the flower ride its bike?
A. Because his pedals fell off
|
scampers |
| Q. What did Adam say to Eve on Christmas?
A. «It is Christmas, Eve.»
|
scampers |
| Q. Why did the bee go to the doctor?
A. Because he had hives.
|
scampers |
| Q. How do you make fruit punch?
A. Give it boxing lessons!
|
crystal & kristy |
| Q. What runs around your backyard but never moves?
A. The fence
|
strawberri |
| Q. What is Donald Ducks Favorite Tv show?
A. The Duck-U-Mentaries
|
jokester |
| Boy: I got blamed for something I didn’t do.
Friend: What?
Boy: My Homework!
|
Bookworm |
| knock knock
who’s there?
arrowana
arrowana who?
arrowana see you again!
|
Amy |
| knock knock
who’s there?
orange
orange who?
orange you going to open the door?
|
boOpiE |
| Q. What do you catch but not throw?
A. A cold.
|
Vart |
| Q. Where is a cow’s favorite place to be?
A. A MOO-sment park!!
|
Laura (Monkey) |
| Q. What is Mickey Mouse’s favorite car to drive?
A. A Minnie Van!
|
Laura (monkey) |
| Q. why were the baby strawberries upset?
A. because their mum and dad were in a jam.
|
ezza |
| Q:When do ghosts play baseball?
A:When their spirit is catching
|
Ralph |
| Q. what do you call a banana doing a split?
A. A banana split
|
phil |
| Q. Who has the most dangerous job in Trannsyilvannia?
A. Dracula’s dentist.
|
Britt |
| Q. what has two eyes[i] and sees[seas] all around?
A. Hawaii
|
WIZARD GIRL |
knock!
knock!
who’s there?
isabelle!
isabelle who?
isabelle outta order! Hee! hee! hee!
|
Shelly |
Q. What do you call a 3 headed monster
with 9 legs, 1 arm , 55 fingers and
no ears?
A. any-thing you want it can’t hear u!
|
Shelly |
| Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the street?
A. To get to Jurassic Park!!
|
Katie(Pigglefish) |
| Q. What did the monster say to the bug?
A. Nothing, monsters are not real!
|
Katie (Pigglefish) |
| Q. How do you catch a squirrel?
A. Climb up a tree and act like a nut
|
Ashley |
| Patient: Doctor,Doctor I think i’m a pack of cards!
Doctor: I’ll deal with you later!
|
cool18 & cool20 |
| Q. what time is it when a ghost comes to dinner?
A. Time to go!
|
lid |
| Q. what has two banks but no money?
A. a river.
|
matt |
| What do you use to fix a broken tooth?
Answer: toothpaste.
|
matthew |
| Q:What do you call a well balenced meal?
A hamburger in each hand.
|
Court |
| Q] what did mars say to the sun?
A] you’re hot!
|
nate |
| Q. Why did the basketball player go to the dentist?
A. because he wanted to get more shots.
|
brint |
| Q. If a rooster layed an egg on the top of a roof, which way would it roll?
A. roosters don’t lay eggs silly
|
Bambie |
| Q. What does a ghost wash his hair with?
A. Shamboo
|
Jay-Jay |
| Q. What do you get when you cross dracula and a snowman?
A. *frostbite*
|
Jen |
| Q: Where do ghosts go to live?
A: Where everyone else lives, the living room!
|
cassie |
| Q. Why did the butler bring a deck of cards in the hall
A. He wanted to deck the halls
|
FOXY |
| Q:What is a cat’s favourite part of the computer?
A:The mouse!
|
Gudiya |
| How does a cow do math?
It uses a cowculator!!!
|
ANGEL |
| Q: How do you count a herd of cows?
A:
With a cowculater.
|
Kris |
| Q: What did the lawyer name her daughter?
A: Sue!
|
Bree |
| Q: why did the girl go outside with her purse open?
A: To see if there was any change in the weather.
|
saphire |
| Q: Where do fish put their money?
A: In river banks!
|
Coco roco |
| Q: Why was the math book sad?
A: Because it had so many problems.
|
coolbmg |
Q: Why did the girl name her horse
Ink?
A: It kept running out of the pen!
|
Emi |
| What did the traffic light say to the car?
Don’t look, i’m changing!
|
G-Money |
Q. where did the teacher leave her
keys?
A: on the computer
|
tabby |
| Where does a snowman go to dance?
A snow ball!!!
|
Diamond |
| Q} What is the difference between a teacher and a train?
A} The teacher says «get rid of the gum!» the train says «chew! chew!»
|
cute |
| Q: The cowboy left on friday, spent 3 days & came back on friday. how can that be?
A:
his horse is named friday.
|
whitgirl |
Q:whats worse than finding a
worm in your apple?
A:finding a half of worm in your
apple!
|
pink lady |
| Q: Where does the coumputer go to dance?
A: The disc o.
|
abc… |
| Q: where do fishes sleep?
A: on a water bed
|
donovanantoniojarman |
| Knock Knock?
Who’s There?
Olive.
Olive Who?
Olive You!
|
Matthew |
| Q: Where did the fish go when he was sick?
A: to the docks
|
Kee |
| Q.Where does a wasp go when it gets hurt?
A.The waspital.
|
footballgirlk |
| Q: What room is a bear’s favorite room?
A: The den!
|
Liz |
| Q: What do you call two witchs that live together?
A: Broom mates
|
Kay |
| Q: what is a catipiller afraid of?
A: A dogapiller (DOG)
|
nins |
| Q: WHY DID THE BEAR EAT THE TIGHTROPE WALKER?
A: HE WANTED A WELL BALANCED MEAL.
|
soccerstar |
| Q: What kind of boats do mosquitoes like best?
A: Blood vessels!
|
Tiana |
| Q:How much fun can you have doing arithmetic?
A:Sum Fun
|
amoos |
| Q: What do cats eat?
A: Catfish!
|
coolwill01 |
Q: What do you get when you cross a
dinosaur with a pig?
A: Jurassic Pork!
|
ponygal |
| Q: what do you get when you cross a turtle and a porcipine?
A: a slow poke
|
ponygal |
| Q: What was the first bus to cross the ocean?
A: Columbus.
|
buck |
| Q: Why wouldn’t the crayfish share his toys?
A: Becuase he was a little shellfish!
|
sharon |
| Q.What would you rather have an old ten dollar bill or a new one?
A.a old ten is more than a new one dollar bill.
|
boshe dogg |
| Q)what did the captin of the sub say to the first mate?
A)there’s something fishy out there.
|
class clown |
| Q: Were did the sheep get her hair cut?
A: At the Baaaaaaaaarbbbbber shop
|
Nikki |
| Q: What is full of holes, but holds water?
A: ….A sponge
|
Cricket |
| Q: How do the famers move there cows?
A: A moo-ving van.
|
JB |
| Q: What does a cat read?
A: cat-alogs
|
GDream4 |
| Q: Why did the lady throw the head of lettuce out the window?
A: Because she wanted a tossed salad.
|
Katie |
| Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit?
A: Unique up on it!
Q: How do you catch a tame rabbit?
A: Tame way…..unique up on it!
|
Daniel |
| Q: What do you get when you cross a dog, a bird, and a car?
A: A flying carpet
|
Lisee |
| Q: Why couldn’t the sailors play cards???
A: Because the Captain was standing on the deck . HE HE HA HA
|
Pink Shadow / KaTe |
| Q:There are 13 copycats and 1 dives in a pool, how many are left?
A:none.
|
piolina |
Q: IF APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY FLOWERS
WHAT DO MAY FLOWERS BRING?
A: THE PILGRIMS
|
JESSICA |
| Q: What did the glue say to the stamp?
A: STICK WITH ME, WE’LL GO PLACES{LAME RIGHT? SO WHAT!!!!!!!!}
|
Princess |
| Q: How is a joke so much like a pencil?
A: Because if it dont have a piont its useless.
|
dj |
| Q: WHAT DO U GET WHEN U CROSS A CENTIPEDE AND A PAROT?
A: A WALKIE TALKIE!!!
|
French Fry [Ashley] |
| Q: What kind of waves wash up on a small beach?
A: microwaves
|
Joey |
| Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground Beef
|
megan |
| Q: Why can’t you tell a joke in a cornfield?
A: There’s to many ears!!
|
chicken legs |
| Q: What kind of museums do cows go to?
A: Mooseums
|
YBOY |
| Q: Why did the dog sit in the shade?
A: Because he didn’t want to be a HotDog.
|
Mr. T |
| Q. What has 18 legs and caches flies?
A. A baseball team.
|
LDog |
| Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: To get to the udder side.
|
Drew |
| Q: Why was «Math» upset with English?
A: Because English was trying to check Math’s spelling.
|
MATH TEACHER |
Q: What do you call a rich duck?
A: lucky ducky |
natmo |
| Q: What do you get when you cross a pair of pants that are smart?
A: Smarty Pants. Hee, Hee.
|
Dollywood |
| knock knock!
who’s there?
candy
candy who?
candy door be opened?
|
kEVIN |
| Q: What do you call a snail on a ship?
A: A snailor
|
Jordy |
| Q: Why did the picture go to jail?
A: Because he was framed!
|
Lulu |
| Q: WHAT IS GHOST’S FAVOURITE FOOD?
A: SPOOKGETTI!
|
S- ANGEL~ |
| Q: What did one candle say to the other candle?
A: Are you going out tonight?
|
KaTe |
| Q. What did the baseball player say when he hit a homerun?
A. See you later ball, I have to run home!
|
JT |
| Q: What kind of music do mummy’s like?
A: Wrap!
|
jazzy |
| Q: What did shaggy say when he couldn’t find scooby doo?
A: scooby dooby doo where r u we have some mysteries to solve
|
smart not!!!!! |
| Q: If i had $50 and you gave me $20 what would I have?
A: $50 because you wouldn’t give me $20
|
mets |
| Q: What do you do when an elephant breaks his toe?
A: You call the toetruck
|
what |
| Q: WHY IS THE MONKEY ACTING SO CRAZY?
A: BECAUSE HE WENT BANANAS.
|
JAMOO=JAM=JULIA |
| Q: Why can’t a dalmation dog hide from it’s mom?
A: Because it’s spotted haahaaa
|
hanin and minas |
| Knock!Knock!
Who’s there?
Snow
Snow who?
Snow use I can’t remember!!
|
Chuckie |
| Q. If a butcher is six feet two inches tall, what do you think he weighs?
A. Meat
|
Bean Head |
| (Say to an adult)You say:»How many kidneys do you have?»
They say: «two»
You say: «Wrong! You don’t have any kid-nees, only adult knees»
|
Bean Head |
Q: why did the cow cross the road?
A: Because it was the chickens day off! haha you like that don’t ya. Well i thought u would ya know because everyone just loves my jokes! |
moula moula |
| Q. What do you call an annoying vampire?
A. A PAIN IN THE NECK
|
Bean Head |
| Q. what is the differece between «here» and «there».
A. The letter «t»
|
Bean Head |
| Q: What can you hold in your right hand but not your left hand?
A: Your LEFT elbow
|
Bean Head |
knock knock!
Who’s there?
Lettuce
lettuce who?
lettuce go out tonight! |
tigerlover |
Q: What do you call a polar bear in
Africa?
A: Lost
|
Dany |
Q: Why was the coach yelling at the
operator?
A: He wanted his Quarter back,
hee hee!
|
Dany |
| Q: Where do snowmen keep there money?
A:
In a snow bank!
|
fattony |
| Q: why was the duck mad?
A: because he couldnt get his bill out of the mail.
|
nana |
| Q: WHAT DID THE CAPET SAY TO THE FLOOR?
A: HUSH I HAVE YOU COVERED
|
kel |
Q: What do you call a dog that sits in
front of a fire?
A: A hotdog.
|
Chey |
| Q. what did the tub say to the water?
A. run to me i’ll hold you.
|
smiley |
| Q: Why do fish swim in saltwater?
A: Because pepper makes them sneeze
|
Wesley |
| Q: Why did the girl tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
A: So she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping pills.
|
cookie girl |
| Q.Wich president was the biggest ham?
A. Abrahham Lincon of course
|
J rod |
| Q: What kind of pet lives on the floor?
A: A carpet
|
andy |
| Q: Why did the bee get married?
A: Because he found his honey
|
opedy |
| Q.Why do birds fly south for the winter?
A. Because it’s too far to walk.
|
mike mike mcc |
| Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Door bell repare man! Get it?
|
Spice |
| Q: What do whales spread on their toast?
A: Jellyfish
|
KLC |
| Q: What kind of bird is always sad?
A: A bluebird.
|
KCee |
| Q: What’s the difference between a football and a duck?
A: You’ll find one in a huddle, and the other in a puddle.
|
Sunshine |
| Q: What was the 1st animal in space?
A: The cow that jumped over the moon
|
bubba |
| Q: What does a house wear?
A: Address
|
Brad |
| Q: Why didin’t the coach trust his team???
A: Because there were to many sneakers in the lockerroom!!!!
|
Lil k.c |
| Q: What happened to the cat that ate a ball of yarn?
A: It had mittens!
|
Zebedee |
| Q: What does a GINGER-BREAD MAN use when he breaks his leg?
A: A CANDY CANE !!!!!
|
ice-crean sunday |
| Q: What is a sharks favorite snack?
A: Fish and ships
|
emer |
| Q: Why did the boy put the reportcard over his head?
A: He wanted to get higher grades
|
matt |
Q: In which garden doesn`t flowers
grow?
A: In a Kindergarden
|
jas girl |
| Q: Why did the docter cross the patient room?
A: Becuse she didnt want to get a shot.
|
tony |
| Q: What do you call two banana peels?
A: a pair of slippers
|
nicky. d |
| Q: What do you call a sleeping Dinousour?
A: A Dinousnoras
|
nicky. d |
| Q: What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?
A: An envelope.
|
Nick |
| Q: What does a cow say to a human?
A: When is it going to be moonday?
|
uncle bob |
| Q: How is 2+2=5 and your left hand alike?
A: They both aren’t right.
|
Lizzy |
| Q: What is black and white and read all over?
A: A newspaper
|
your_gurl |
| Q: Why did the horse pass the note to the cow??
A: Because she was mootiful!
|
T-Bone |
| Q: Where did dracula BUY HIS PENCILS?
A: PENCIL-VANIA
|
kaje |
| Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A CAT WHITH STRIPES?
A: LION
|
zar |
| Q. Where do the cows go on vacation?
A. To the movies.
|
Ruby |
| Q: What did the duck want with his soup?
A: Quakers
|
its me |
| Q: What drinks pop and sings at the same time?
A: A pop singer
|
rachel age 9 |
| Q. Why did the bee get married?
A. Because he found his honey.
|
tigger |
| Q: What did the mother buffalo say to her son that was going to college???
A: Bison
|
Katie |
| Q: How do you save a hippo drowning in hot cocoa?
A: Throw in a marshmallow
|
Laura Acorn |
| Q: Why did the caveboys and cavegirls have a easier time in school?
A: Because there was no history to study
|
Minny Girl |
| Q: What did the hamburger name his daughter?
A: Patty.
|
TEE TEE |
| Q: Why did the jelly roll?
A: It saw the apple turn over
|
Didi |
| Q: What’s a camel with no humps?
A: A horse of course
|
Kangarroooo18 |
| Q.WHAT DO YOU FIND UP A CLEAN NOSE?
A: FINGERPRINTS
|
CHEESE |
| Q: What does a wizzard’s cat drink just before it goes to bed?
A: A sorcerer of milk
|
kangarrooooo18 |
| Q: Which weighs more? a pound of feathers or a pound of lead.
A: They both weigh the same!(a pound)
|
funny |
| Q: What kind of milk do you get from a sunburned cow?
A: strawberry milk
|
Cash |
| Q: Why are chickens such good workers?
A: Because they work around the cluck.
|
Taylor |
| Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
A: A stick
|
Wheetius |
| Q: What do you lose every time you stand up?
A: Your lap
|
hebs |
| Q: What do you have year round but can only see in the winter?
A: Your breath
|
hebs |
| Q: If you had only one match which thing would you light first? A wood burrning stove, Kerasein Lamp,or an oil burrning stove?
A: The match
|
Bradilydumbduck |
| Q: Why did the pig get kicked off the football team?
A: Because he always hoged the
ball.
|
Sponkey |
| Q: Why did mickey look up in space?
A: To find pluto his dog.
Q: Who was the first spy who went under water?
A: James Pond
|
jj the duck |
| Q: What do you call a crate of ducks?
A: A box of quackers.
|
dodo |
| Q: What’s baby Dil’s favorite ride???
A: The strollercoaster
|
Alissa |
| Q: How do you get out of a house with a mirror and a table?
A: Look in the mirror, see what you saw.take saw, saw table in half.Two halves make a hole.Climb trough hole
|
~movie_star* |
| Q: Why don’t elephants take a holiday?
A: They don’t like packing their trunks
|
Charlotte |
| Q: What did Ernie say to Bert when he wanted some ice cream?
A: Sure Bert (sherbert)
|
pebbles |
| Q: Why did the spider go on the computer?
A: To set up a web.
|
Ak |
| Q: Why are elephants large,grey,and wrinkly???
A: Because if they were small,white,and smooth,they would be asprin!
|
Court |
| Q: Why was the boy staring at the car’s raido?
A: He wanted to see a car-toon
|
kbs |
| Q: When is a door not a door?
A: When it’s ajar.
|
Max S. age 9 |
| Q: How can you communicate with a fish?
A: Drop it a line
|
Syaf |
| Q: What letter of the alphabet can you eat?
A: A brown-E
|
Tashia |
| Q: When there is a hole in a pumpkin what do you fix it up with?
A: A pumpkin patch.
|
maxy m. |
| Q: What kind of a joke does a crow like?
A: Corny ones
|
austin |
| Q: Why are kings babys?
A: Because there always sitting in a high chair
|
tyler |
| Q: Why does a cat remind you of christmas?
A: Because of his sandie claws.
|
Christie |
| Q: Why do birds fly south?
A: Because it was to far to walk
|
shelbyroo |
| Bob: I fell off a 10 foot ladder.
Rob: Were you hurt?
Bob: No I fell off the second step.
|
Manny |
| Q: What did the «sun» say to the moon?
A: Don’t you think I look «HOT»!
|
Manny |
| Q: What do you call wood that has nothing to do?
A: Board!
|
Manny |
Q: Why shouldn’t you tell a joke to an
egg?
A: Because they will crack up!!
|
Manny |
Q: What did the plate say to the
other plate?
A: Lunch is on Me!
|
scotty |
| Q: Where do chickens live?
A: In Ken-clucky.
|
Chris |
| Q: What do hawks eat for dessert?
A: Mice Cream
|
pooh |
| Q: What did the Crayon call her son?
A: Art
|
MINNIE MOUSE |
| Q: How do your teeth stay together?
A: TOOTHPASTE
|
carbear |
| Q: What flower is between the nose and the chin?
A: Tulip
|
tntonytiger |
| Q: What did the teddybear say when she was offered dessert?
A: No thanks. I’m stuffed.
|
daredevil |
| Q: What’s a witches favorite asignment?
A: Spelling
|
Frankie |
| Q: What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
A: You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish
|
Beth Ann |
| Q: What did the star say to the little star?
A: Your to young to be out at night.
|
blue |
| Q: Why did the moon fall down?
A: There where to many holes
|
cathy |
| Q: What kind of pets do computers like?
A: A mouse
|
jon jon |
| Q: Where does a computer take it’s sick pets?
A: To the intervet
|
eggcorn |
| Q: What do you have to pay to go to school?
A: Attention
|
Sarah |
| Q: What kind of rings do fruits where when they are getting married??
A: onion rings
|
Angel |
| Q: What do ghost eat?
A: BOO-LONEY
|
SHEADA |
| Q: Do mummies like being mummies?
A: Of corpse! Of corpse!
|
soccer girl |
| Q: WHAT IS IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE?
A: THE LETTER H.
|
ddduuutttyyy |
| Q: Why didn’t the bike finish the race?
A: Because it was two tired!
|
PJ age6 |
| Q: what is a fisherman’s favorite pitch?
A: A sinker
|
beaver cleaver |
| Q: What is the best thing to take in the desert?
A: A thirst-aid kit.
|
aot |
| Q: What did the magnet say to the second magnet?
A: «You’re very attractive.
|
aot |
| Q: What did the invisible man say to his girlfriend?
A: «Baby, you’re outta sight.»
|
aot |
| Q: What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A: A cloud
|
Princess |
| Q: Why was the mother flea mad?
A: All her children went to the dogs.
|
krissy811 |
| Q: What is a skeletons favorite road?
A: Dead end!!!
|
Big eye (Andrea) |
| Q: Whats the longest word?
A: Smile because it has a mile in it.
|
Ash |
| Q: What did the pig do after school??
A: hamwork !!!!!
|
joy |
| Q: When is a potato not Irsh?
A: When it’s a french fry
|
me |
| Q: Why did the bee go home?
A: To go get his honey
|
jaybug |
| Q: Why is the math book so grunpy?
A: Because it has to many problems.
|
julian |
| Q: What do you call a snail on a ship?
A: A snailor!!
|
C-DOG |
| Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope?
A: Stick with me we’ll go places.
|
lil’z |
| Q: What did the little acorn say when he grew up?
A: Geometry (gee I’m a tree)
|
sweet pea |
| Q: What did the pancake say to the syrup?
A: We’re in a sticky situation, pal!
|
sweet pea |
| Q: Why did the tomato smush it self?
A: Beacuse his dad said ketchup.
|
MR.GIGGLES |
| Q: Why did the tree cross the road?
A: Because he wanted to leaf.
|
dragon |
| Q: What’s green, has bumps, and plays football?
A: The Green Bay Pickles
|
Mr. B |
| Q: What kind of music does bedrock listen to?
A: Bedrock and roll
|
Bo Bo Man |
| Teacher: When I was your age I could name all the presidents in order from 1st to last.
Student: Yeah,but when you were my age there had only been 1 or 2.
|
cameron |
Q: What does one peanut say to another
peanut?
A: You crack me up
|
Hannah banana |
| Q: What is the name of the candy that is never on time?
A: Choco-LATE
|
magneto |
| Q: Whats a frog’s favorite drink?
A: A diet croak!
|
iceerz zack ziomek |
| Q: What radio is a pig most afraid of????
A: a HAMradio
|
bob |
| Q: Why did the police go to the baseball field?
A: Because someone was stealing a base.
|
Air Bear |
| Q: How does a horse greet his neighbor?
A: Howdy naaaabor
|
mel |
| Q: Why would Snow White make a good judge?
A: Because she was the fairest of them all!
|
katty |
Q: On Valentine’s Day what did the
two volcanos say to each other?
A: I LAVA YOU! Ha,Ha,Ha!
|
Rupert |
| Q. How do you make soup gold?
A. Put in 14 carrots!(Karrots)
|
Funny |
| Q. What goes up but never comes down?
A: Your age!
|
whatever! |
| Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: Meet you at the corner
|
randy |
| Q: Why are barbers such good drivers?
A: Because they know all the shortcuts!!!!
|
dolphin09 |
Two muffins were in a oven one muffin says to the other muffin
«wow it’s hot i here»
the other muffin replies
«AHHHHHHHHH a talking muffin»
hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahah |
lonestar |
| What do you get if you cross an electric blanket with a toaster?
You pop out of bed in the morning!
|
Pri |
| why did a crab get arrested??????
because it kept it pinching
|
poppadom |
| Q.The Blue House is in the left the red house is in right were is the white house
A. In Washinton D.C.
|
Funny Banas |
| what room can a student never enter?
A mushroom
|
welcome |
what has 4 wheels 1 horn and gives milk?
a milk truck |
kitty |
What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence?
Time to buy a new fence! |
Yodelady |
| Q.what did king tut say when he was scard?
A.i want my mummie!
|
lisa |
WHAT IS A SNAKE’S FAVORITE SUBJECT?
HISS-STORY |
RasberryKelly |
| why did the women plant gold in the garden?
because she wanted rich soil
|
oj |
| Q. What is a volcano?
A. A Mountain with hiccups
|
Tristin |
| why couldn’t the kid see the pirate movie? because it was rated RRRRRRRRRRRRrrrr |
zack’s girlfriend |
| What is harder to catch the faster you run?
Your breath.
|
SABBY |
knock knock, whos there?
hatch.
hatch who.
bless you |
wiwib |
| Why did the kid eat his homework?
Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
|
megabucks |
| whats the only ride that a baby can ride?
A strollar coster
|
nutt case |
| Q:How did the teacher know Jessica was going to be an astronuat when she grew up?
A: She took up so much space in school
|
Syd |
| Q: What is brown and smells like chocolate pudding
A: chocolate pudding
|
gupu |
What’s the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish. |
joejoe |
| Q:What’s a computers favorite board?
A: It’s mothers!
|
Carissa |
| (Q) WHATS HEAVIER 1 POUND OF LEAD OR 1 POUND OF FEATHERS?
(A) THEY ARE BOTH 1 POUND.
|
BATON QUEEN |
| What is the hardest bow to tie?
A rainbow
|
Mackadamia |
| What do you call two marred spiders
Newely-webs.
|
steveo |
| Q:What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back.
A:a stick
|
yoda |
what kind of car does mickey mouse
drive.
a minnie van
|
katlynder |
| 5/4 people are bad with fractions |
cool |
| What did one wall say to the other?
Meet you at the corner!
|
pheeeeeeeeeelickz |
| What do you call a deaf monster?
Anything you like he cant hear you
|
jake |
Q: Why do they have fences on
cemataries?
A: Because people are DYING to
get in.
|
Megsters (u know who I am) : ) |
pupil:miss would you shout at me for something i didn’t do
teacher:no, why?
pupil:because i didn’t do my homework. |
fairy |
| Q.what do you call a mushroom at a party?
A.fun-guy
|
BO BO |
| What has holes but holds water?
A sponge
|
Antonio |
| why is a ghost always sad? Its always blue! |
Aillie |
| Where do you take a sick wasp?
To the waspital!
|
hot roma |
| what did the traffic light say to the car?
ANSWER IS: dont look,im changing.
|
Ant |
| Why is a math book so grumpy?
Because it has so many problems.
|
Julian |
| «What’s green and sings» «Elvis Parsley.» |
president somalia |
Q. How is 2+2=5 and your left hand alike?
A. They both aren’t right. |
Feather |
Q. What did the lawyer name his daughter.
A. Sue |
Feather |
Q. How does a cow do math?
A.It uses a COWculater |
Feather |
| Docter,Docter I think I am a deck of cards!
Do not worry I will DEAL with you later.
|
Feather |
| what do you call a flying elephant? a jumbo jet |
ning |
| what is a fly a car and a pet. a flying carpet. |
pony |
| What kind of underware did King Tutt where?
Fruit of the tomb.
|
pea.daddy |
| (Q) whats a mummys favorite kind of music?
(A)wrap music
|
princess14 |
what did the rug say to the floor?
I got you covered |
caca |
| A duck goes in to a store and buys some chapstick. The clerk asks if this will be cash or charge. The duck says just put it on my BILL |
logo |
| Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?
Because it was felling crummy. HA HA HA
|
Jerry |
Why can’t Potatos hear?
ANSWER:becaues Corn has ears and patatos have Eyes. |
cool dudeet |
What did the judge say to the skunk?
oder in the court,oder in the court |
Georgia |
What goes up and never comes down?
Your age. |
angel |
| Teacher:»can you name two days of the week begining with the letter «T»?
Students: Today and Tomorrow
|
moon face |
| why did the thermometer go to college?
Because he wanted to get a degree
|
moon face |
What do u call a dog with a
fever?
A «hot dog». |
Shay Baby |
what do call a girl with a weave?
unbeweaveable |
niny |
(Q)If an athlete has athlete’s foot, what does an astaurnat have?
(A) Missile Toe! |
Christine |
What is a ghosts favorite jam?
Booberry Jam! |
Sarah Knight |
| A baby lion is chaseing a man around a tree.Mother Lion:Honey, don’t play with your food. |
quick boy |
| what do u call a piece of wood that has nothing to do?
a board/ Ha!Ha!Ha!
|
maganter |
‘waiter waiter theres a fly in my soup’
‘thats alright sir, he wont drink much’ |
chihuahua |
‘waiter waiter, this soup tastes funny’
‘then why arent you laughing then?’ |
chihuahua |
waiter:we have almost everything on the menu sir’
Diner: so i see, will you kindly bring me a clean one?’ |
chihuahua |
‘waiter, call the manager, i cant eat this stew’
‘he wouldnt eat it either sir’ |
chihuahua |
customer:’waiter waiter, theres a dead fly in my soup’
waiter(sobbing)’and he was so young’ |
chihuahua |
‘waiter waiter, whats this fly doing in my soup?’
‘looks like its trying to get out sir’ |
chihuahua |
‘doc-doct-docter, i ha-ve diff-i-cul-ty sp-eak-ing’
‘sorry i wasnt listening, could you repeat that?’ |
chihuahua |
‘what illness do retired pilots get?’
‘flu’ |
chihuahua |
‘doctor,doctor, my hair is falling out, can you give me anything to keep it in?’
‘how about a paper bag?’ |
chihuhaua |
| music teacher:What is a pizzicato? student:Pizza for cats. |
crystal |
there were two muffins sitting in the oven
one muffin said «man its hot in here!»
the other muffin said»ahhhhh a talking muffin!!!» |
anna bannanna |
What do you get when you cross a
vampire & a teacher?
Lots of blood test!
|
Kate Girl |
| What did Godzilla say to king kong? It’s a small world isn’t it? |
marsh |
| What did Snow White say when she dropped off her film?
Someday my prints will come!!!! Hee Hee!! HoHo!! Ha Ha Ha!!!!
|
Diva *’s 001 |
| {Q}What is as big as an elephant and doesn’t weigh anything?{A}It’s SHADOW |
abe |
A:What do you call to married
spiders
Q:newley webbed!
|
TABA |
A:What do you call two married
spiders?
Q:newley webbed!
hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha
|
TABA |
What do you call to banana peals?¿
A pair of slippers/hahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha |
frogger the frog |
| Three men walked into a building.You would think one of the men would’ve seen it! |
Lil’missy |
| Q:What did the bird say on Valentines Day?
A: Your my treeheart.
|
smile |
Say your writing a bus you counted 20 houses and when u came back you counted 20 houses
how many houses are there?
20 because you counted the same 20 houses Hahaehha
|
Maria |
| What did the horse say to the human ?
Nothing horses dont talk
|
alldayroma |
| Q) why did the themoneter go to college`
a) to get a degree
|
Nellie |
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A
SKUNK WITH A TEDDY BEAR?
WHINNIE-THE-PU |
Kitty |
(Q) what did the anouncer named his
son?
(A) mike
|
pinklady |
| Q:Why don’t animals eat clowns?
A:Because they taste funny.
|
Rachel |
| what did the boy say when he saw his dog laying in the sun? ‘hotdog’ |
pelos |
| Q: What is a bears favorite soda.
A: Coca Koala
|
Mohawk |
| Q: Why did the cat tickle the mouse before he ate him?
A: He wanted a happy meal
|
JSHJ |
| spell and say toast ten times. t o a s t. «toast» keep going.
Q: What do you put in a toaster???
A: Wrong!! BREAD!!!
|
hunny |
| Q:how does a tree count?
A:like this one two tree
|
Nocktowl |
| Q:Why did the boy eat his homework?
A:Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
|
jay jay |
| Q: What has a head at night and no head at day?
A: a pillow
|
p |
| Q:What did the lifegaurd name his daughter?
A:Sandy
|
Bryana |
| Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A POLAR BEAR IN THE JUNGLE?
A: LOST
|
beaver |
| Q: what did the pacific ocean say to the atlantic ocean??????
A: nothing ,he just waved
|
jazzy |
| Q: why did the orange run half way down the hill?
A: it ran out of juice
|
tesha t |
| Q: Why did the dog cross the road?
A: To get to the «barking» lot!
|
tasha |
| Q:Why did the cow cross the road?
A:To go and see the MOOOOOOOvie.
|
Chi Chi |
| Q: What do you call a grouchy hamburger?
A: A crabby patty!!!!!!!!!!!
|
BRAT |
| Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A COW ON THE FLOOR?
A: GROUND BEEF
|
nAT |
| Q: What did the traffic light say to the zebra?
A: Close your eyes im changing
|
Vinni |
| what did the lettuce say to the tomato ……….look im ahead!! lol hehe |
katiebelle |
| What part of a fish weighs the most?
ANS: the scales
|
Pips |
| Q:Why did the pig take karate?
A:To be a pork chop.
|
tex |
| WHAT DID THE TEACHER EAT FOR LUNCH?
A TEACHERBURGER
|
SAE |
| What is the hardest thing in skydiving
the ground
|
Billy Bob the 3rd |
| Q: who won the skeleton spelling bee?
A: No Body!
|
megs |
| Q:What do books carry with them when they dont have a phone?
A:They carry pagers.
|
karen |
| Q What do you call a dog with no legs?
A you can call him all you want he still will not come to you
|
fo fo |
| Q:Why do cats love computers?
A:Cause it comes with a mouse.
|
DMP |
| why did the chicken cross the road half way?
she wanted to lay it on the line.
|
myrtle |
| Q:What is the biggest ant in the world?
A:Antartica!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
Avi |
| Why was Cindrella late for the ball?
She forgot to swing the bat.
|
Lafy Tafy |
| Who won the miss ghostly contest??
No body!
|
jana wana |
| What did the fast french fry say to the slow french fry?»
You need to ketchup with me!»
|
nicki |
Question:
why are baseball players so cool?
Answer:
because they have fans
|
pancho |
| Where do fish cash a check?
At the river bank!
|
hopis |
| What kind of phones do they use in prison?
Cell phones!!!!!!
|
pam |
| What did the teacher say to the sweet student????
Your a piece of cake!!!!!
|
phebs |
| Q:WHAT IS A HORSES FAVOURITE PROGRAMME
A:NEIGHBOURS
|
jess |
| Q. What does a bee say when it flies backwards?
A. Zzzb. Zzzb. Zzzb.
|
Kalibug |
| why did the duck become a spy?
answer:
because he was good at quacking codes
|
richyrich |
| What starts with E,ends with E, and only has one letter?
An envolope
|
katherine R. |
| Why do cows have bells.
Because their horns dont work.
|
Floww |
| Where did tarzan go on his vacation?
To hollywood & vine!
|
CES |
| What do you get when you cross a pond and a stream?
You get wet feet
|
RobMan |
| Q:How Many Seconds Are In A Year?
A:12 Jan.2nd Feb.2nd March,2nd……..
|
K-Mak |
| two guys are driving to disney land they come to a sign that says»disney land left» so… thay went back home!!! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
JML |
| Q:why couldnt the 11 year old see the pirate movie?
A:because it was rated argh
|
chaseroo |
| Q:what is it called wene a ghost uses the restroom?
A: BOO BOO
|
shorty |
Q.Why did the granny put rollar
skates on her rocking chair?
A.Because she wanted to rock and roll!
|
jackson.rose |
| Q: What do birds eat for breakfast??
A: Tweet-bix
|
ping |
| Q: Why did the ghost go up the elervator??
A: He wanted to raise his spirits.
|
ping |
| imagine you are in a haunted house and your surronded by ghosts, vampires and evil monsters.
how do you survive??
stop imagining!!
|
ping |
| Q: Why is the city of Ohio different?
A: Because it»s high in the middle and round at both ends.
|
ping |
| Q:Why did the dog climb the tree?
ANS:Because he wanted to get the bark.
|
Pips |
| why do giraffes have long necks?
because they have smelly feet!
|
Didie |
| What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino: elephino |
Ghost Jones |
what is as big as an elephant
but weighs nothing?
an
elephants shadow!!!!!
|
alexis |
Q: What do you get when you cross an
octopus and a hungry shark?
A: An octagon!!!
|
Wally |
Q: Where is a pirates favorite place to
eat?
A: Arrrrrrrrby»s
|
Robby Rex |
| Q: What did the lamp say to the pen?
A: click me on
|
skouter |
| Q: What happens when a clock gets mad?
A: It gets ticked off!
|
DJPhatboi |
| Q: Where does a cow like to go to eat?
A: MooDonalds (McDonalds)
|
cutiepie10 |
| Q: Why didn»t the 11-year-old get into the pirate movie?
A: It was rated ARRRRR!
|
BOBBY |
| Q: Why did the tomato blush?
A: It saw the salad dressing!
|
Bob-omb |
| Person 1: Did you hear the one about the pencil?
Person 2: No. How does it go?
Person 1: Oh, nevermind. It»s pointless!
|
NEN |
| Q: HOW DO YOU FIX A TUBA?
A: WITH TUBA GLUE!
|
cute |
| Q: What do you do with a blue whale?
A: Cheer it up
|
riddler |
| Q: What has 4 «i»s but cannot see?
A: Missisipi
|
Ange |
| Q.What did the cement say to the earthquake?
A.You crack me up with your jokes
|
Jessie |
| Why did the banker take away the rinos credit card.
So he would stop charging.
|
TaLl |
| Whats another name for a snail.
A booger with a crash helmet.
|
TaLl |
When do you see a cute person?
When you look at me. That’s true.
If you don’t think so come see me. |
Brandy |
| Q:Why did the man start to chase the birds at the golf range?
A:So he can get a birde
|
CrAzY jAkE |
| Why did the vampire go to the cafeteria?
ANS:He dropped in to get a bite!
|
Pips |
| Person1,Did you hear the joke about the hole?
person2,No.
person1,Good. It was to deep for you.
|
Trey |
| what did the octopus say to the girl octopus?
Can I hold your hand hand hand hand hand hand hand hand
|
moni q |
| WHAT DU U CALL A DEER WITH NO EYES.
NO EYE DEER
|
PIMP |
| Q.What do you call a worm in a apple.
A.A teachers pet
|
nemo |
A man said Doctor Doctor I think I need glasses
and the man said you certainly do sir this is a restaurant |
Hannah C. C |
what do you call a snail on a
boat?
A snailer |
pimp stuff |
| what do you call a cow in an earthquake?
a milkshake
|
mac |
| Q:WHAT DOES A MUMMY SING IN THE SHOWER?
A:A RAP
|
J-DOG |
Q:What did the spider say the fly
came to its web?
A:Welcome to my website!
|
mimi |
| WHAT GOES UP WHITE COMES DOWN YELLOW.
A: A EGG
|
KENDRICK AND TOBY |
| What do you get when you cross an elephant and a goldfish
swiming trunks
|
winky |
| why do Gorillas have big nostrals?
because they have big fingers
|
gangsta |
| where do ghosts live?
In dead ends
|
chabernaberquire |
| Q:What do the FBI people do when a tornado comes?
A:Go under cover
|
lady |
| What is the best hair cut to give your lawn?
A MOWhawk!
|
Bryce Cyrier |
| Why is there always a fence around the cemetery?
Because people are dying to get in!
|
Bryceman |
| Q: why did the salesman go up the elevator?
A: he wanted to get a raise.
|
dad’s_gurl |
Whats green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!!! |
Ducky |
| What do you get when a Jauger and a elephlet are together?
A: A Fancy car with a long trunk!
|
Punisher |
| A:why did the cookie go to the doctors
Q:because he was feeling crumby
|
cherie |
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A
PRINCIPLE WITH A CLOWN?
ANSWER:FUNNY TROUBLE
|
COTTONTAIL |
| What did they give tweety when she was sick?
A medical tweetment
|
bubba |
| What do oceans do when they pass each other?
They wave!
|
dan |
| what does a fish say when it hits a cement wall?
Dam
|
smurf |
| A:knock knock
B:who is there?
A:cow goes
B:cow goes who?
A:NO,cow goes moo
|
lil angle |
| How many graves are in a grave yard??
All of them
|
Marie |
| what do you get when you cross poison ivy and a 4 leaf clover
A rash of good luck!
|
little miss smarty pants |
| Q.What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A.A gummy bear
|
articuno |
| What do you get with a cow school play?
ANSWER: A moooooosical!
|
bigfoot the 3rd |
| Q: Where did the cow take his date?
A: To the Mooooooovies!
|
JessLynn92 |
| Q: should i tell you the story of the lemon?
a: I am sorry but its too sour for you feelings.
|
bubblegum boy |
| Q: WHERE DO COMPUTERS GO TO DANCE?
A: THE DISK-O
|
miss priss |
| Q: What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A: A cloud
|
jacko |
Q: What goes up and never comes down?
A: Your age |
frogwings |
| Q: What do you get when you cross a turkey with a peach?
A: A peach gobbler(cobbler)
|
team krunch |
| Q: Why are hair dressers good drivers?
A: They know all the good short cuts!
|
poo |
Q: If you cross a vampire with snow, what do
you get?
A: Frostbite!
|
piggygrl0123 |
| Q: why was the leaf crying?
A: because it fell
|
kenzie |
| q: why dosen»t a turkey eat much?
a: because he is always stuffed!
|
livee mae |
| Q: What starts with P, and ends with the letter E?
A: A post office.
|
Angle |
| Q: What did the ranch say to the salad?
A: cover me I»m dressing!
|
Sissy |
| Q= what do you get when you cross a dog, a car and a bird?
A= a flying-car-pet!
|
monkey girl |
| Q: Where do you always rake the leaves?
A: the ground
|
fuzzo |
| Q: What is the differance between a bird and a fly?
A: A bird can fly but a fly can»t bird.
|
Popcorn |
| (Q) why doesn»t a cheetah like to do laundry?
(A) it has so many spots
|
Brandon’s Girlfriend |
| Q: what do you call a cat that went to red cross school?
A: a first aid kit
|
jesus girl |
| Q: why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: because he has virus!
|
patty |
| Q: What always ends evreything?
A: «G»
|
EmmyEm66 |
| Q: why was the shoe talking?
A: because it had a tongue
|
maceo |
| Q: what do you get when you cross a witch with sand?
A: A sandwitch
|
brittthehit |
| Q: why did the ketchup cross the road?
A: because he had to ketch up with the mustard
|
tiffy |
| Q: WHAT ARE TREES FAIVERET DRINK?
A: ROOTBEER.
|
paige |
| Q:what»s big gray and protects you from the rain?
A:An unbellaphant
|
hottie |
| Q: what kind of milk do you get from a pampered cow?
A: Spoiled
|
hottie |
| Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence Pete fell off. Who was left?
Repeat
Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence Pete fell off. Who was left?
Repeat!
|
wako |
| Q: What vehicle would a cow drive?
A: A milk truck!!!
|
Teacup |
| Q: Why did they have to put a fence around the graveyard?
A: Because people were dying to get in!
|
GG |
| Q:what did the math teacher make for snack
A: pie
|
funny Bunny |
Q: What kind of cheese isn’t yours?
A: nacho chesse |
Emmi |
| Question: What do you call a cow sleeping on the ground???
Answer: Ground beef!!!
|
Babyhawk |
| CUSTOMER:WAITER WHY IS MY FOOD FLAT?
WAITER:WHEN YOU ORDERED YOUR FOOD YOU SAID TO STEP ON IT!
|
TWEETY |
| Q: Who is santa’s wife???
A: Mary christmas
|
delter |
/q/ What starts with an e and
ends with an e with 1 letter in it?
/a/ an envelope
|
inu-girl |
| Q: What is the highest building?
A: a library, because it has alot of stories. get it?!
|
tiffany |
| Q: What did santa use when he twisted his ankel?
A: A candy cane
|
O’lela |
| Q: What do you get when you cross a snowstorm and a cornfeild?
A: cornflakes
|
Allie |
| (Q)why did mrs.mushroom marry mr.mushroom?
(A) because he was a fun….guy!
|
fay |
| Q.What does a rat sound like in tap shoes
A.rat a tat tat
|
Ray |
Q.What do you call the musicial
part of a turkey?
A.The Drumstick.
|
birdie |
| Q.Where do books sleep?
A.Under their covers.
|
Ry |
Q.What has wheels and a trunk but no
engine?
A.An elephant on roller blades.
|
Ry |
| Q.What did the cook name his son?
A.Stu.
|
Ry |
Q.What do you find in the middle of
Nowhere?
A.The letter H.
|
Ry |
Q.Where did the snowman keep his
savings?
A.In a snow bank.
|
R |
Q.Why was the lamp flunking his
classes?
A.He wasn’t very bright.
|
Ry |
Q: Whats a dogs favorite instrument?
A: A TromBONE |
Lindsay |
| Q. what can you hold without your hands?
A. Your breath!
|
vezza |
| Q: Should I tell you the story of the body snatchers?
A: No, I’d better not you might get carried away
|
Bubblegum cuddlebun |
| Q: What Did the Bug Say When He Hit the Winshield?
A: I would do that again but I don’t have the guts
|
Rattlesnake |
| Q: What is the same between a farmers wagon and a dogs tail?
A: The tails a wagon
|
Ash |
| Q: What do you call a mermaid in the artic ocean?
A: BURR!maid
|
candy |
Q: What kind of key dosen’t open a
door?
A: a mon-key |
syd |
| What goes oooooooh?
A cow with no lips
|
bud |
| Question: What animal do you must duck under?
Answer: A duck
|
Astevin |
| what time is it when a elephant sits on your watch?
Time to get a new watch!
|
sha sha |
| Why did the baby chick go to the dollor store?
Every thing was «cheep cheep»
|
m and m sisters |
| Q.How does an egg run?
A.It scrambles!!!!
|
hunter1243 |
| FATHER: How are your grades, son?
SON: Under water, Dad.
FATHER: Under water? What do you mean?
SON: They’re below C level.
|
dude |
| Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Harry
Harry who?
Harry up I’m starved!
|
monkey girl |
| What starts with p, and ends in e and has millions of letters in it?
A post office
|
livia |
| What do you do if a rhino charges you?
You give him your credit card!!!
|
Lucas Walker |
| What did the tree say to the other tree?
I’m rooting for you!
|
bonez |
| What do you call a bubble in trouble?
BUBBLETROUBLE
|
bubble CHICK |
| Do you want to hear the butter joke?
I’m not going to tell you. You might spread it.
|
coolchick |
| What’s a fish’e worst day?
Friday
|
abe |
What do elephants use to talk to another elephants?
The elephone |
ashashmartin |
| What is a monsters best day of the week?
Chewsday
|
cool chick |
| What is the scarest day of the week?
Frightday
|
princess cool |
| What did the ghost eat at the party?
I scream
|
kit kat |
| Q:Why is there no story about a vampire with a broken tooth?
A: There is no point to it!! Ha ha ha
|
Princess weirdo |
Why did spongebob wear to pairs of pants to
go golfing?
In case he got a hole in one!
|
lu |
| Where do cows go on dates?
The moooovies!
|
jla |
| What do snowman eat for breakfast?????
Snowflakes!! hahahaha
|
Trich5 |
Q.Did you hear about the unlucky sailor?
First he was shipwrecked then he was rescued
by the Titanic. |
hawk |
| What happens when a panda causes trouble? Panda-monium! HA-HA |
tarty |
| Q.Why do bears get grounded?
Because they growled at their mothers!
|
I’m bananas |
| What kind of shoes do snakes wear?
Snakers!!!!
|
katy |
| WHY DID THE LITTLE GIRL THROW THE BUTTER THROUGH THE WINDOW?
BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO SEE BUTTER-FLY
|
ANNA BRITISH |
| Question: What monster eats the quickest?
Answer: a goblin
|
tattoo |
| How do you clean a messy tuba???????????
With a tuba tooth paste!!!!
|
how do |
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims |
Chicken |
| What did the quarter name his daughter? penny |
sammi |
| Why are dragons bad bosses?
Because they keep on firing people
|
Berry |
| What did the analog clock say to his mom?
Look ma no hands
|
Slowmo |
| What did the mummy ghost say to the baby ghost?
Spook when your spooken to!
|
ambeee |
| Did you hear the one about the skunk?
Don’t worry it stinks.
|
d-man |
| What kind of keys do kids like????
cooKIES!!!!!!!!
|
cutie |
Do you want to hear the ceiling joke?
I should not tell you, it is too far above your head! |
smileyman |
| What Do Bees Wear When They Go Swimming???
BEEkinies
|
Crystalite |
| What room has no doors windows and no walls?
a mushroom
|
devin rizzo |
| What does a dog and a tree have in common?
They both bark
|
DRY |
| Q.Why did the vampire go to the doctors.
A.because he needed a blood test. ?
|
katey |
| Why do sharks live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
|
pealsapples |
| What kind of dog can tell time?
A watchdog!
|
Cassie |
| Q. What runs around the garden without moving?
A. A fence
|
ems |
| Q.what kind of beans are humans?
A.human beans
|
mike jones |
| Q:Why did the lady chase her nose?
A:Because it was running
|
Claire Bear |
Q.What do u call when a Vampire bites
a Snowman?
A.Frostbite
|
Courtney Stagg |
| Why did the «Fun Guy» leave the party?
Because there wasn’t mushrooms!
|
Totally Toast |
A duck walks into a candy shop byes a stick of gum.
The cashier askes cash or charge?
The duck says put it on my bill! |
K |
| Q. What did the boss say to the electrcian when he was late?
A. Wire you insulate?
|
krisy |
| What animal do you not want to play cards with?
A cheet-ah
|
Rach |
| Q: How many seconds are in a year?
A: 12 starting with the second of
January.
|
Singing Shat |
What is a ghosts favorite lunch meat?
Boolony |
scott payton |
Q.why did the old lady put wheels
on her rocking chair?
A.so she could rock and roll!
|
kitkat |
What did the computer do at lunch time?
Had a byte |
Rossy |
| Why is a classroom like an old car?
Because its full of nuts and has a crack at the front.
|
Hanmin |
| What did one zombie say to the other?
Get a life!
|
hammy |
| What goes up when the rain goes down?
A. an umbrealla
|
T.V. GIRL SHEA |
| Q: Why did the teacher have to get glasses?
A: Because she could’t control her pupils!!!
|
sweet-e-pie |
| Q .what do u call a alligator who lives in a alley.
A. a alleygator
|
lexie |
| Why are fish bad at tennis?
They don’t want to go near the net!
|
1 blink 2 blink |
| Why do cheetahs don’t like playing hide and seek?
Beacause they all ways get spotted!
|
Wiggles |
| Why do babies like to play basketball?
They like to dribble!
|
rachy |
| Q. What do you get from nervous cows.
A.Milkshake
|
bc100 |
| What did the crocodile say to an aligator?
See you later alligator.
The alligator said:
after awile crocodile
|
anneka1111 |
| What does a witch math teacher give you?
A math curse
|
GATE student |
| Q. What did the bowling ball say to the pin?
A. Lets roll
|
cisco dood |
| What do ya say when a dinosaur does’t see ya?
I don’t think he saur-us
|
dino |
| Q. Who does a football coach go fishing with?
A. His tackle
|
patrick parker |
| Does any animals have keys?
Yes, Monkeys and Donkeys
|
zorra |
| What do you call cheese that is not yours?
Nocho cheese.
|
cool kulls |
| What can lift up a plane?
A pilot.
|
Reani |
| TEACHER: Go to the map and find North America.
student Stephen: here it is.
TEACHER: correct. now class who discovered America?
CLASS: Stephen
|
nia123 |
| Q:What Kind of Dogs can Jump Higher Than A Building?
A: Any Dog -A Building Can’t Jump.
|
honeyface |
| How did the soilder fit a tank inside of his house?
A: It was a fish tank!!!!
|
Ghetto Gurl |
| Amer: Dad can u write in a dark
Dad: I think so. What do u want me to write.
Amer: Your name on my report card
|
Maryum |
| What did one eye say to the other?
There’s something that smells
between us.
|
Daisy |
| Q.Why did the teacher jump in to the lake?
A.Because she wanted to test the water.
|
Betsy |
| A deer a skunk, and a duck go into a restrant. When it is time to pay , the deer did not have a buck, the skunk did not have a cent, so they put it on the duck’s bill! |
Goldie |
| Which is the biggest jam?
traffic jam
|
amru |
| Where do sheep go on vacation?
The Bahahahama’s!
|
kierra |
| WHAT HAVE TEETH AND CAN’T BITE?
COMB.
|
MC HAMMER |
| What washes up on small beaches?
Microwaves
|
Bee |
A man went to the doctor and said, «I have a memory problem.»
The doctor said, «OK. Tell me more about your problem.»
The man said, «What problem?» |
klj |
| What did Mona Lisa say when she was hauled into court?
I was framed!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
jk |
| How do you know if there is a dinosaur under your bed?
You listen for the dino-snoar
|
bugs321456987 |
| What did the nickle say to the penny…
I have more cents than you!!!
|
mocca |
| Why did the woman hold her purse out in the rain?
She wanted to see if there was any change in the weather.
|
siris the viris |
| TEACHER: Class we are learning about the history of milk.Turn to page 124 in your book.
STUDENT: Can’t we just skim it?
|
Emily |
Q. What is the difference between
a pig and a squirrel?
One eats corn and one eats acorn!!!!!
|
Ann |
| What does a bee do flying backwards?
zuzub zzub zzub
|
beans |
| What do you see on a clear day in California? U.C.L.A. |
cowgirlup95 |
| What goes up but never comes down?
Your Age
|
cowgirlup95 |
| How do u make freinds with a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut
|
Sabre |
Q. WHAT DID THE GHOST HAVE FOR HIS DINNER?????????
A.SPOOOOGHETTI !!!!!!!!!! |
22222 CAT 222222 |
WHAT DO BEES WHERE WHEN THEY GO TO THE BEACH?
A BEEKINI |
KITTY |
| What did one tree say to the other?
Are you stumped on that problem?
|
shannygirl |
| What did the giant do when he stubbed his toe?
He called a tow truck!
|
Crazy Aaron |
| What does a 200 pound mouse say to a cat?
Here kitty kitty kitty!!!!!!!!
|
Crazy Cowgirl |
| why did woody (on toy story) have alot to say?
They kept pulling his string.
|
baby balla |
| What is your date of birth?
July 15.
Which year?
Every year.
|
HARRIS |
| Whats the difference between a bird and a fly?
A bird can fly but a fly can’t bird.
|
gem gem |
| What do you call a robo skunk?
R2PU!!!!
|
Flame |
How do u spell hard water with
3 letters?
ICE
|
nastassia |
| WHY WAS THE BROOM LATE FOR WORK.
IT OVER SWEPT
|
LELE |
| Dad:Are you hungry?.
Boy:Yes.
Dad:Nice to meet you hungry…whats your last name?
|
ninja boy |
What asks no questions but requires many answers?
The doorbell! |
twetty |
What do vampires wear in the fall?
Bat-to-school clothes. HaHaHaHa! |
tweety |
| A man walks into a doctors office and says «I have a Memory problem»
The doctor says «OK tell me more about your problem»
The man says «What problem?»
|
cowgirlup95 |
| what do you call a train full of toffee?
A chew chew train!
|
storm |
| What is a clouds favorite color?
Every color of the rainbow!
|
sra |
What do you get when you pass milk and ducks?
Milk and qwackers. |
kk |
| Spell fork 3 times
spell pork 3 times
what do you use to eat soup?
a fork
no a spoon
|
babe |
| Q: what do you call a grizzly bear in the rain?
A: Drizzly Bear!
|
Natalie Marin |
| Why was Mother Owl upset with Junior Owl?
Beacause he didn’t give a hoot
about doing his homework
|
MLC |
| where does mickey (in ninja turtles)hate to be sited in a restaurant?
In a non-joking section.
|
night wing |
| What do you call a wizard with a runny nose?
Harry snotter
|
Abbie |
What did the two history teachers
talk
about on there date?
Old Times
|
cutie pie |
| What is the most musical part of a turkey?
The drumstick
|
Neha Madeyanda |
| How does a ghost cry?
Boo!-hoo
|
Neha Madeyanda |
| What is an Alligators favorite drink? Gatorade. Hahahahaha |
Magic Girl |
| What do you get when you cross a porcupine & a pig?
Porky Pine
|
Morgstar man |
Q.what do you call a dinosaur with 1 eye
A.do-you-think-he-saw-us |
jh |
| Q. what did the armless man say to the robber?
A. you wouldn’t shoot an unarmed man would you?
|
jimmy |
| Why did Mozart sell his chickens?
A. Because they wouldn’t stop saying «Bach, Bach, Bach.»
|
Del |
Teacher: I would like one of you to say a sentence using defeat
defence and detail.
Student:De feat of de dog went over de fence before de tail.
|
Del |
| A duck and a rabbit went to a restaraunt who do you think paid?
The duck he had the bill!!!!!
|
MC Mong |
Kle you’ve owed me 50cents for weeks. I’ll tell you what. I’ll forget half of what you owed me.
Ok I’ll forget the another half. |
monkey |
| What’s a pirate’s favarite letter?
Arrhhh (R)
|
Shawnella |
why couldnt the bike move any more.
The bike was to tired. ha ha ha |
sparky |
| Patient: doctor, doctor, I have 59 seconds to live!
Doctor: I’ll be with you in a minute
|
winker |
| What did the coffie bean say to the other coffie bean?
How have you bean today?
|
Erica |
Teacher: Today class we will have a
halfday this morning.
class:yeah!!
Teacher: we will have the other half this afternoon?
|
G-dog |
Two muffins were in a oven.
The first muffin said: «Boy, its hot in here!»
The other Muffin said : AAAAHHHH a talking muffin!!!!»
|
Heather |
| what did the plate say to the other plate?
lunch is on me.
|
na nehn babo |
| Why are gorilla’s nostrils so big?
Because their fingers are!!!
|
Sarah |
| Q:What type of lizard do you find in the Sydney Opera House?
A:The lizard of OZ!
|
Samio |
| Patient: Doctor! Doctor! I just ate a pen
Doctor: Well, sit down and write your
name
|
Edison |
| What do you put on a pumpkin when he has a cut?
A pumpkin patch!
|
Pretty Princess |
| How do babies cheat at nursery school?
crib notes
|
bo bo man |
why did the police man
watch the baseball game?
Because somone stole second!
|
base ball game |
| Why was the spider on the computer?
Because the spider was finding a web site!
|
knrk |
| Flight assistant: «would you care for an orange juice»?
Person:»if it needed me»
|
ppp ooffff |
| How do you know Saturns been married so many times? Because he has so many rings |
roxy |
Why did the robber paint his hands blue?
Because he didn’t want to get caught red handed |
twiz |
| what has no beginning, no end, and nothing in the middle? A doughnut |
mano |
| What did the metric alien say?
take me to your liter.
|
two two girl |
| Why are horses so hard to get along with?
Because they always say «NEY»!
|
George |
| Q:»Waiter why is my food flat?»
A:»because when you ordered it you told me to step on it.»
|
lilash |
| Why didn’t the lion eat the clown?
Because they taste funny!
|
LauraJessie97 |
What did the octupus say to the lady octopus?
I want to hold you Hand, Hand, Hand,Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand, Hand |
Bubbles |
| WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THE WOODEN CAR ?
IT WOODEN GO !
|
DUCKY GIRL |
tom took a mushroom called henry everywhere with him.
one day mary said ‘why do u take that mushroom with u every where u go?’
tom replied ’cause hes a fungi to be with!’ |
rachee |
what occurs once in a minute
twice in a moment
but never in a day?
The letter M
|
scraggycat |
| MARK : doctor doctor I keep seeing double!
DOCTOR : sit on this chair
MARK : which one?
|
rachee |
| which candle burns longer,a red one or a green one?
neither, they both burn shorter!
|
dogalog |
| Which state has a ton of laundry to do? Washington! |
nene 012thisle |
Why can’t the leopard escape the zoo?
He always gets spotted!!! |
gina228 |
| Mike: Do you beleive in love at first sight?
Sally: Not from where I’m standing.
|
cheese |
| What starts with T ends with T and is full of T
A Teapot!!!!!!!!!!!
|
Hana |
| Mary: This is a cool baseball game.
Tom:I’m Hot
Tom:Lets go by Jim
Tom: He is a big fan!!!!!!!!
|
Hana |
| What did the story-telling cat say when he backed into the electric fan????
Thats the end of my TALE, TAIL
|
Hana |
what do most people like to put in
their cake?
THEIR TEETH!!!! |
chris brycz |
What do you call a fake noodle?
an impaster! |
madzangill |
| What did the baby corn said to his mother?
Ans:Where is my pop corn?
|
kittyblubber |
Why are little Egyptians confused?
Because there daddys are mummies. |
Lil John |
| Q: What is a mummys favorite music?
A: Rap Music
|
Jack |
| What kind of jacket does an octopus wear?
Answer: An ARMY jacket
|
duckey |
| Mark: Teacher how do you spell rat.
Teacher: R-A-T.
Mark: No, how do you spell rat.
Teacher: What sentence are you using it in.
Mark: My mother told me to get in rat in.
|
It’s bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S |
WHO DO YOU CALL WHEN AN INSECT IS
HURT?
ANWSER: AN ANT-BULANCE! |
isy |
| What is a foot that has no toes?
A ruler!
|
sjrocks!!!! |
| Why did the jelly bean go to school?
Because it wanted to be a smartie
|
Star Baby |
| What’s the ghost team that won the world series?
The boo jays
|
funky monkey |
WHERE’S THE BEST PLACE TO EAT WHILE TRAVELING?
WHEN THERE IS A FORK IN THE ROAD |
peanut |
| Teacher: Give me a sentence using the words defeat, defence and detail.
Student: De feet of de dog went over de fence before de tail.
|
coolie |
| Q.When is the best day to go to the beach?
A. Sun-day.
|
lilly |
WHY DID THE BOY GO TO THE PARTY WITH A DIAPER ON?
BECAUSE HE DIDINT WANT TO BE A PARTY POOPER! |
dude |
passenger: «which end of the car do I get off?».
conductor: «either one. it stops at both ends.» |
joel |
| How do you now your a pirate?
your just arrr
|
bum |
| Q: Railroad crossing railroad cars, can you spell that without any R’s?
A: T-H-A-T
|
shelb |
| Why is Alabama the smartest?
Because it has 4A’s and a B
|
Cindy |
| Q.Why was the Egyption boy confused?
A.Because his daddy was a mummy!
|
Cutie |
| Did you hear about the spaceship?
It is out of this world.
|
Pile-o-mud |
What kind of soap do seacreaters use?
tide |
twiff |
| Q: Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school?
A: Because she had bright children!!!!
|
J.C. |
teacher: make a sentence with liver and cheese.
student: liver alone cheese mine! |
Candy |
| Where were you when you cut off the lights?
In the dark!!! ha ha ha
|
jessie |
| Were does the spaghtti dance?
At the meatball!
|
Meatballs |
| q: where do monsters like to swim?
A: in lake erie
|
squirt |
| Q-why did the belt go to jail
A-because it held up a pair of pants
|
fishy frog |
| Q-what do you find in kids noses?
A-finger prints!
|
baby girl |
Where did the farmer take his pigs on a sunny Sunday
afternoon?
On a pignic
|
Ky |
Why was the mosquito up so late?
It had to study for its blood test |
missy |
| What trees do fourtune tellers look at?
palm trees
|
box head |
| Q:
Why did the kid put hay under his bed?
A:
To feed his nightmare!
|
Lavender10 |
| Mike: Mrs.Applebee,would I get in trouble for something I didnt do?
Teaher: Of course not Mike.
Mike:Good,Cause I didnt do my homework.
|
nerdyprep |
My mom thinks that I’m very bright.
That is why she always calls me son. |
ET |
What’s a cats favorite color?
purrrrrrrrrrple |
silly sasauges |
| Why could Peter pan fly?
Because he could never never land.
|
caity |
| Why can’t you tell jokes while you’re ice skating? ANSWER: the ice will crack up! |
A-a |
| Q: What does every skeleton say before meals?
A: Bone-appetite!
|
A-a |
Why did the batter build his house on legs?
so he could have a homerun |
Dewy |
| What turns red when you scratch its head?????
A match
|
dusty |
| why did the girl run around her bed?
BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO CATCH UP WITH HER SLEEP.
|
MONKEY |
What do you call a monkey that stinks.
A funky monkey |
montell |
take that mask off its not
halloween! |
pimp |
| Why do sharks live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them
sneeze.
|
sharkman |
What did the mayonnaise say to the
knife?
Don’t spread it onto thick
|
Dee |
Why did batman go in a tree?
To look for Robin |
Gieco |
Q:Why doesn’t the king and queen play cards?
A:Because jokers are wild!!!!! |
Froggy |
| When is a door not a door?
When its a jar
|
brandon |
What’s the tallest building in your city?
A Library of course! Because it has the most stories |
Vman |
| What does the bee comb his hair with?
A honeycomb!
|
sara |
| Why was the car so stinky? it had way to much gas! |
lo |
| What did 1 skunk say to the other? Let us spray. |
Loebeth |
| Why don’t aliens get hungry?
Because of the mars, the milkyway and the galaxy.
|
abbi dabbi doo |
| What do you get when you cross a elephant with a computer?
A ton of knowledge
|
cutie 3 |
| Why did the orange go to the doctor?
Because he was peeling!!!!
|
beach babe |
Money isn’t everything.
There’s Also VISA, MasterCard and Credit Cards. |
Mandy |
What is a boxers favorite
sandwich?
A Knuckle Sandwich
|
lil jj |
| doctor doctor i feel like a pack of cards!
I will deal with you later
|
sunshine |
| What did the orange say to his mom?
«I’m not peeling well.»
|
C.A.T |
| Why did Max wear a helmet to bed?
Because he wanted to crash!
|
Bear-Bear |
Why were the elephants kicked out of the pool?
Because they couldn’t keep their trunks up. |
divajd |
| What did the math book say to the pencil?
I have alot of problems.
|
isgrant |
WHAT TYPE OF OF FLOWER IS UNDER YOUR NOSE
ANWSER:TULIPS |
KITTY |
| What animal needs to wear a wig?
A Bold Eagle
|
missy |
| Q: how do you fix a rubber duck
A: duck tape
|
TWIFF |
| What do you call a box of ducks? A Box of quacks! ha! ha! ha! ha! |
chey |
knock knock.
who’s there?
radio.
radio who?
radio not here i come. |
radio |
| What’s a snakes favorites subject? hisss tory |
dan |
doctor doctor I think I’m a pair of curtains.
Pull yourself together then |
tunny |
What is a Basketball Players
favorite kind of story?
Tall Tales
|
twin B |
What did the snake write at the bottom of the note?
L0VE AND HISSES. |
missy |
| Why was the piano on the porch?
Because it forgot it’s keys!!!
|
AngiePangie |
| What sort of fish comes out at night time?
A starfish!!!!!!
|
cookie |
| Why did the flamingo lift up one leg to drink water? because if he lifted up the other leg he would’ve fell!!! |
princess |
| What did one candle say to the other?
lets go out together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
melissa |
| Q: What is a vampires favorite sport
A: batmintan
|
robert eric anthony hennick of the joke |
| Man: what is a million yrs. ?
God: A second to me.
Man: What is a million $ ?
God: A million $ is like a penny to me.
Man: God, will you give me a million $ ?
God: Sure, just wait a second! lol
|
Vegie Girl |
| WHY DID THE GIRL RUN AROUND HER BED?
because she wants to catch up on her sleep!!!
|
lgirl |
| How many witches does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but she changes it into a toad!
|
Lizzy |
| Q.which is the longest bus in the world?
A. Syllabus!!!!!!!!!
|
saturn |
| Q. Which is the longest rope in the world?
A. It’s Europe!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
Saturn |
Why didn’t the nickle roll down the hill with the penny????
It made more cents!! |
Carolineeee |
| Q:If it takes 2 men,2 hours to dig a hole,how long does it take 1 man to dig a half a hole?
A:You can’t dig half a hole.Ha! Ha!
|
Cow |
| What did the banana say to the guys joke?
You split my sides!
|
Billy Bob Joe |
knock knock
whos there
isabell
isabell who
isabell necessary on your bike |
joker |
| Q: Where does a polar bear keep his money?
A: in a snowbank!
|
Hamsterman |
WHAT’S A PLANT’S FAVORITE DRINK?
ROOT BEER! |
MAWC |
| Q: Where would you find your lost dog?
A: In The-Lost-And-Hound
|
duty |
| What does a basketball player have in common with a baby?
They both dribble
|
kay kay |
| If three ghosts run a race which one will win?
The one with the most spirit
ha, ha ,ha
|
beebetz |
| Why did the girl think she was in charge of the class?
because she had the ruler
ha, ha, ha
|
beebetz |
Who did Frankinstein take to the dance?
His goul freind! |
Beaver |
| Where does vampires take baths? In the batroom! |
Beaver Boy |
| how do you start a teddy race?
Reddy, Teddy, Go!!!!
|
The joker |
| Why did the girl think she was the ruler of the soccer field?
Because she had the yard stick!
|
HOTTIE |
knock knock.
whos there?
Britney.
Britney who?
knock knock.
whos there
Ops I did it again |
joker |
kyle:Hey michel I can spell something that has over a hundred letters in
it.
Michel: What?
Kyle: Post office!
|
fifer slicer |
| What did the cow say when she was bored.
There’s nothing to do-o-o-o
|
Bilesha &Kourtney’s Joke |
| sick person:Doctor Doctor i feel like a branch off a tree.
Doctor : try not to snap!
|
POYSON |
| Why did the Hamburger go to the gym?
To get better buns!!!!
|
Who’s Funny? |
| Q: What do you give a hungry tiger??
A: Anything it wants!
|
Melissa |
| do you now why the boy had a measuring tape under his pilow?
because he seeing how long he could sleep
|
Tina |
| Q. A wasp got hurt where did it go?
A. The waspital
|
tanya |
how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
he could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck chucks if a wood chuck could chuck wood |
cookie |
| Where do fish keep their money?
in river banks. lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
katie bug |
| What is green outside and red inside?
Watermelon!
|
Yos |
| How do you stop your pets from getting ticks?
Don’t let it wear a watch
|
Raman |
| Q; What do you do if your toe falls off?
A: You have to call a toe truck
|
dirty dog |
| Q: What is a monster’s favorite drink?
A: ghoul-aid!
|
Rajavi |
| Daughter: Mom I’m home.
Mom: Where have you been the FBI
was looking all over for you?
Daughter: The FBI?
Mom: Yes your Father,Brother,and I!
|
Jazz |
Ok, your in a race and a kid runs
faster than you.
What do you do?
Drink catch up!!!!!!
Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!
|
kyliy |
| Q. What is the smallest room?
A. a mushroom
|
greensom |
| What do you do when a dragon sneezes.
Run for the fire extinguisher!
|
zee |
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frost-bite |
Tony |
Billy’s mom had four kids Penny, Nickel, and dime what was the fourth ones name?
Billy!!! Get it? Billy’s mom. |
dance |
| How do you know there is an elephant in your refrigerator?
There is 1 set of foot prints!
How do you know there are three elephants in your refrigerator?
You can’t shut the refrigerator door!!!!!!
|
TIFF-TIFF |
| What weighs nothing and is as big as an elephant? An Elephant’s shadow! |
dog |
| Why did the nurse bring a RED marker to school?
In case she had to draw blood!
|
winker |
I BET I CAN MAKE YOU SPEAK LIKE A DOG.
what is on top of a house?
A ROOF!!!!! DO YOU GET IT. HA HA HA!
|
don omar |
| Why did the kid bury the flashlight underground? Because the batteries were dead |
squeeze neice |
| What do you get when you mix Yu-Gi-Oh with homer? Yu-Gi-d’oh |
nickman |
Where does santa clause swim?
the north pool |
yo yo |
| Why was the customer of Burger King on the roof?
Because the waiter said, » Burger’s on the house.»
|
Kat |
WHAT IS A MOLE’S FAVORITE GAME.
DON’T WHACK A MOLE |
FREAKY GIRL |
Did dinosaurs have telephones?
No, but the croc-dial did |
Ace Bunny |
| What did the egg say to the clown? you crack me up |
lucky |
HOW MUCH IS 5Q+5Q?
10Q
WELCOME! |
ding dong |
| WILMA: What time is it when seven hungry lions are chasing you?
HALEY: uuuh.
HALLEE: I do not know.
WILMA: seven after one
|
hEnRiEtTa LuCiLe |
| What did the cake batter say to the baseball glove? A:Batter-up! |
crazy lady |
Q.What did the waiter learn when he joined the navy?
A.How to take orders!!! |
tedddymonster |
| What is the perfect souvineir?
Handcuffs Because they are made for two-wrists! (tourists)
|
Miranda Panda |
| what did the digital clock say to his mom?
look mom no hands!hahaha
get it.
|
speeder-65 |
| what did da policeman say to his tummy?
ur under a vest!!!!!!!
|
lol |
| What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad sandals.
|
Tiff |
waiter waiter!
There’s a bee in my soup! Of course, it’s alphabet soup! |
jj |
| What did the north say to the south?
We are positive together
|
ash |
| man: Theres a fly in my soup!
waiter: That will cost extra!!!
|
da king yeado |
| What is a mummy’s favorite food?
A wrap! That is the funniest joke EVER!
|
funnybunny |
| BOY:EWW! Theres a bug in my fries!
CAFETERIA LADY: Don’t worry, kid. The spider in your burger will eat it up in no time!
|
Crazy Smiling Face |
| Q: What did the ghost say to the panda bear?
A: BamBOO!
|
spaggetti and meatballs |
| What does 24 feet of water and a bad report card have in common?
They’re both under C level!
|
hhharrypppotter |
| Q: Can you drop a full glass but not spill any water?
A: Yes if the glass is filled with milk!!!
|
carecat |
what happened to the bird who was ill
he had to have tweetment |
bambi |
| Why are twin witches hard to tell apart? They can’t tell which witch is which. lollollollollollollol!!!!!!!!!!!! |
candy girl |
| Q. What kind of stick do you use for your lips?
A. A Chapstick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
sunrise |
What do you get when you cross
superman and a bowl?
SuperBowl |
Nicky |
| Why did the farmer name his pig ink? Because it kept running out of his pen |
hgidt |
| What do you call a strawberry when it is sad?
A blueberry!
|
applesoup |
| What place is a ghost scared of?A living room |
skippy |
| What did the mommy volcano say to the baby volcano? I lava you |
Andrew |
what does a rockstar and a geologist have in common?
they both like rock |
chelsey h |
| Who is the newspaper editor’s favorite person?
A: The Press-ident
|
Spitfunny101 |
| doctor: I have some good news and bad news.
patient: whats the good news.
doctor: you have 24 hrs. to live.
patient: whats the bad news.
Doctor I have been trying
to tell you that sense yesterday.
|
the boss |
| Why did the orange roll half way down the hill. cause it ran out of juice. |
joker |
| What is an aliens favorite game? All star baseball |
lord |
What do skeletons say before they eat?
Bone appetit! |
charchar |
| What kind of cut does the bee get? A buzz cut |
alley |
Where do sheep go on vaction?
To the Bahamas!!!! |
Jenny |
What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?
use a cow-culator |
samantha |
| What is the begining of eternity the end of time and space. The middle of forever and the end of every place? The letter E! Ha Ha! |
Isaac |
| Techer: Where are you from?
Student: Kenya.
Teacher: Oh what part?
Student: All of me.
|
cutiebear |
Why did the knife go to the doc?
Because he had a splitting headache. |
waldo |
What has 18 legs and catches flies? a baseball
team! |
Phily |
Did you ever hear about the goldfish that got robbed?
Now he’s a bronze fish!! |
sharky |
| What would you do if a rhino charged at you 60mph?
I’d do 70.
|
London girl |
| A man found a pig and a police officer said to take it to the zoo.
officer: so you took the pig?
man: yes, and we had so much fun at the zoo, today we’re going to the park!
|
chel |
| What did the teacher say to the horse when he came into the classroom ? Answer -why the long face |
Tiana |
What did one flee say to the other?
Do you want to walk or do you want to take the dog? |
piemasterzach |
Why are trees loud?
Because they have a bark! |
Angel |
| What did the baby corn say to the mother corn?
Aswer:Where’s popcorn
|
awawawawawawawawa |
Where do mise go for vacation?
The leening tower of cheesa! |
acacia |
why could’nt the pirate play cards?
answer:he was standing on the deck |
dinoducks4eva |
| Q: where do you get dumb gum from.
A:A dumb ball machine.
|
spo |
What did the fish say to the octopus when he had lemonade?
answer-don’t be such a sour-pus! |
candygirl |
What is Santa’s favorit place to go? Lake Ta ho ho ho!
HO HO HO! |
Kristail |
What Did the Rhino say to the Hippo when it was her birth day?
Hipp- Hipp Horay!!! |
Mrs.Piggy |
| what goes hahahathump?
A man laughing his head off
|
Jess n Tina |
| Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter |
Bubbles |
| Receptionist; Docter, Docter, there’s an invisible man outside waiting for you!
Docter; Tell him I can’t see him at the moment
|
Fizzy |
| Q:Why did the jelly been go to school? A: Because he wanted to be a smarty. |
Pipolo Jive |
| What kind of duck never quacks? DUCK TAPE! |
Pooh |
Doctor: Whats wrong?
Banana: I don’t peel well |
munshcin |
patient:doctor doctor i feel like a pair of curtains.
doctor:well pull your self together then |
Amy |
what do computers like to eat?
megabytes |
little monkey |
| How is the little shark who swalled the silver dollar?no change yet. |
fizz |
patient:doctor doctor i feel like a cowboy!
doctor: how long have you been feeling like this?
patient: about a yeeeeehhhhhhaaaaaa |
demidob |
| Teacher! Teacher! my sister is only 5 years old and she can spell her name backwards Teacher thats quite remarkable what is her name ANNA |
Beksy |
| WHAT IS BLACK AND WHITE AND RED ALL OVER?
SANTA COMING DOWN A CHIMNEY!!!!
|
T-DOG |
| What did pooh say to his agent?
Hand over the honey!
|
lou-lou |
| The frog asked the lady bug how many spots do you have? The lady bug replied none I use moisturizer |
jelly |
| Why did the computer went to the store? to go buy some chips. |
t-bone |
| I have 52 heads,
26 legs and
88 hands
Who am I?
A liar
|
EJD |
What do you call a T-Rex with
Spider Man?
A man eating spider!
|
LINZZ |
| chealsea: i bet i can make you say blue.
maddison: try me
chealsea: whats the color of the chalk?
Maddison: green
chealsea: told you i could make you say green.
Maddison;no you said blue. uh oh.
|
kennedy |
| Why did the basketball player go to the doctor?
A: To get more shots
|
maddy |
| Patient: Doctor,Doctor a crocodile bit my toe!
Dotor: When did this happen?
Patient: When it bit me!
|
scardycat |
How much dirt is in a hole six feet
deep and two feet wide? None it’s
a hole |
kkc |
good news:two boys climbing up a tree
bad news:one fell out
good news:there was a net underneath
bad news:there was a rake beside it
good news:he missed the rake!
bad news:he missed the net too! |
maloki |
What are the one candy that a ghost will never eat?
Life Savers |
sibertiger |
| Where do polar bear keep there money? In snow banks. |
Nelliesamantha |
what do you call a dinosaur that can’t see?
do-ya-think-he-saw-us |
maloki |
Why couldnt the elephant go on the plane.
His trunk didn’t fit under the seat |
kool |
why did the ghost wear a bandage?
because it had a boo-boo!!! |
leo sandoval |
What did one math book say to the ot the other?
I got more problems then you! |
kjp |
what’s the hardest thing about skydiving?
The ground |
maloki |
| how could you tell when a ghost is lying? you could see right threw them. |
Smoothy |
| TEACHER:Max,how many letters are in the alphabet?
MAX:18.
TEACHER:that is incorrect.there are 26.
MAX:there used to be 26, but E.T went home in a U.F.O and the C.I.A went after him.
|
APPLESOUP |
| why do dragons breath fire?because they need to let off steam. |
aragon |
Jim:did you hear about the man who hijacked a boat?
Jill: He asked for 2 million dollars and a parachute |
meanie |
| Joe:I think sports games are boring.
Adam:Why?
Joe: I know the score before it starts.
Adam: What?
Joe: 0 to 0
|
jr. |
| what does a cat say if he/she wants to play :cat i play to |
you |
| why couldn’t the elephant ride the bike? because it had no thumbs to ring the bell!!! |
leo sandoval |
Why is a football stadium cool?
Because there`s a fan in every seat!!!! |
Leigh |
| why was the moon not hungry!!!!! because it was full |
moon |
| What kind of star goes to jail ?
A shooting star
|
cooko |
| why are teachers different from trains? one says spit out your gum and the other says chew chew chew. |
Benny |
| What do you call a fish without a eye?Fsh |
Fish |
| whats a sharks favorite game? swallow the leader |
averi cherie williams |
| Did you hear the story about the germ? Nevermind, I don’t want it to spread. |
Eyeball |
BETTY: Doctor,I seem to have been seeing purple monsters with pink spots.
DOCTOR: Have you seen an eye doctor?
BETTY: No. Just purple monsters with pink spots. HA! HA! HA! |
LADYBUGGY |
| Hey Mike what do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? I don’t know what do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? You get a turken! |
babyphat |
| why was the police in bed? he was a undercover cop |
kekoboy |
| son: i brought a pair of comauflage trousers the other day
father: well why aren’t you wearing them?
son: because i can’t find them
|
vic and nic |
What are the strongest days of the week?
Saturday and Sunday because the rest are weekdays. |
JAZZWOMAN |
| why do you need to pack a band aid in your lunchbox? for the cold cuts. |
bubbles |
Max:I’m sorry my son can’t come to school.
Secertary:Who is this?
Max:This is my mom. |
JRB |
| Joe: mom, wanna hear a long joke?
mom: sure honey
Joe: jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke
|
freddybobjoe & lolulo girl |
| There’s a red house, a white house, and a blue house. The blue house is on the left. The red house is on the right. Where is the white house? In Washington,DC!! |
johnny |
| Molly: What runs all around a soccer field but never moves?
Kirsten: I don’t know what?
Molly: A fence!
|
Munky |
| Why did the fish stay home from school?
She was feeling a little under the water.
|
tcat |
| What do you get when cross an insect with a rabbit?
Answer:Bugs bunny
|
super man |
There is this one story house that has pink walls and pink everything.
What color would the stairs be?
There is no stairs in a one story house |
no name |
Q.Why did the robber wear blue gloves?
A. cause he didn’t want to get caught red handed. |
Krissy |
| What do you do when your auntie is sick?
Give her some auntieseptic.
|
vicky.b. |
| How many cookies can you eat on an empty stomach?
A: Only 1 because after you eat one its not empty anymore!!
|
baby d |
| What did the math book say to the math book?
I have a lot of problems
|
gabby |
| What do you call a man with no legs and no arms in your mailbox?
Bill
|
homie g |
| Q. What did the cloud say to the sun?
A. I’m a little under the weather!
|
blubber nugets |
| Where do you leave your dogs when you go to a football game??
In the BARKING LOT!!
|
home slice |
| Why is it bad to do math in a jungle?
Because if you add 4 and 4 you get ate
|
Blubber |
| Q. Why couldn’t the mummy answer the phone?
A. He was all tied up !
|
Blubber |
| Why did the banana go to the doctors
Because he wasen’t peeling well
|
Alexandra |
| What do you call a berry that is always sad?
A BLUEBERRY!!
|
reef |
| BACON:How’s the weather down here?
EGG:It’s a little sunny side up!!
|
REEF |
| Q: When is a car not a car
A: When it turns into a driveway
|
sari |
| Why did the sun give a half moon a sandwich? Because he wasn’t full. |
Niqua |
| Q: Why do cows wear bells?
A: Because their horns don’t work !
|
Anonomus |
What is your name?
BILL.
How do you spell it?
B I L L.
I spell it I T
|
jess |
| Q. What do bats call the bathroom?
A.the batroom
|
dwinkly finkly |
| What did one volcano say to the other?
I lava you!!
|
bonz |
| What has a head and a tail but no body
A Quarter
|
buldoge |
| A pizza man and a banker are similar because their good with dough. |
pooh |
| what did the big telephone say the little telaphone??? you are to young to get engaged |
XxholzxX |
What did the plane do before it landed?
Took Off |
princess jess |
| Why are penguins so popular on the internet?
because they have web feet
|
chancha987 |
| How does a cow count?
with a cowculator ha ha ha
|
jess |
| Q:What did pirate see the movie?
A:Because it was rated (a)R!
|
FROGGIELUV!!!!!!!!! |
| Q: Why was the ant so confused?
A: Because all of its uncles were ants.
|
Sk8r Gurl |
| Q: Where did the boat go when he was sick?
A: The doc
|
froot loop |
Where did the pencil go on its
vacation? Pennsylvania! |
superstar101 |
| What does a owl say when he meets someone?
HOOT ARE YOU?
|
Twinkie |
| Teacher:Johnny give me two pronouns.
Johnny:Who,me
Teacher:correct
|
Blubber nugets |
| Man:Doc Doc, my wife thinks she’s a Motorbike
Doc:Give her this.
Man:But if I do, how am I to get home?.
|
kayla collett |
| CAN YOU MAKE A SENTENCE OUT OF THE COLORS GREEN,PINK,AND YELLOW?
WHEN THE PHONE GOES GREEN,GREEN,PINK IT UP AND SAY YELLOW
|
SALIMAH |
| Why was the spy in bed?
Because he was undercover!LOL!!!!!
|
~supastar~ |
| Patient:Docter Docter! I keep getting this pain in my throat after i drink hot chocolete!
Docter: Way don’t you try taking out the spoon
|
Smiley Girl |
| What do you get if you cross a teacher and a vampire?
A blood test
|
jayjay |
| Q.What did the sheep say to the other?
A. I’m maaaad at you
|
cool owl |
| What did the duck said to the other? I quack you |
duckhead |
| What does a lamb do when it calls its mom?
Hi Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
|
1Emu |
| What did one cat say to the other?
You look purrrrrfect
|
unsmart |
| Q:Why did the monkey start dancing.
A:Because he went bananas!
|
CrazyMonkey |
| What is the tallest building?
The library because it has the most stories.
|
Spokes |
What do you call a pig on a hot
day?
Bacon
|
Princess |
| Q.why was the elephant afraid of the computer
A.because of the mouse
|
babyballar4life |
WHAT DO YOU GET IF YOU CROSS A KANGAROO WITH A SHEEP?
a WOOLY JUMPER |
HUSHA |
| What did one snowman say to the other?
«can you smell carrots»!
|
melissa thornley |
| What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil?
Get dressed up, the doctor is taking us out
|
Klever Kimbo |
| What did the red fish say to the blue fish?
you’re looking blue, do you feel well?
|
Pokemon girl |
Brian:
Doc I am having a problem in remembering things
Doc:
And when did this problem start?
Brian:
Problem? What problem?
|
peguines |
What do you call a man who tried to steal a cat?
A catnapper |
Robert K. |
| What does a tree drink at a party? root beer |
a |
What do you call a city with over 2500 eggs?
New Yolk City |
froglips |
| What has 4 legs but can’t walk? A chair |
fishy |
| Why did the orange go to the hospital?
It was not peeling well
|
Monkeylover |
| What goes up but never goes down?
your age
|
ghdfgdfc |
| What kind of fish lives in holy water?
an angelfish
|
lol |
What did Mona Lisa say when she was hauled into court?
I was framed!!!!!!!!!!!! |
jk |
| What do you call a vampire who’s car breaks down three miles from a bloodbank?A cab |
Vampiro |
| How do you start a teddy bear race?
Ready teddy go!!!
|
Khan |
| what do you call a snowman that crosses a vampire frostbites |
sin |
| The dog went up to the tree and asked why do you have so much bark? |
bff |
| What do elves first learn in school? The elf-abet |
zaido blue |
| Imagine a duck into a glass bottle how do you get the duck out without breaking the bottle, hurting the duck, or using water?
Imagine it out
|
gsfhadfh |
| Q: why did the car have a stomach ache???
A: Because he had too much gas.
|
Landon |
| WHY ARE BASKETBALL PLAYERS ALWAYS WET?
BECAUSE THE PLAYERS ARE ALWAYS DRIBBLING
|
FLYER |
What do you call a vampire that is sick?
A sickpire. |
Carcar |
| what was squidwards[from spongebob squarepants] girlfriends name?
Think about it his favorite instrument
it is a clara-net ?
|
vany01841 |
| What do fish say when they pucker?
pucker up baby and give me a smack on the lips
|
fishiy |
Why did the cheeseburger run away
from ketchup? Because he didn’t
want to catch up with his past. |
Faith |
| Why are a tree and an elephant the same?
They both have a trunk
|
thepinkgirl |
A Mommy tomato, a Daddy tomato and a Baby tomato all went out for a walk, when the Baby tomato started lagging behind, the Daddy tomato walked back to him, stepped on him and said
ketchup(catch up) |
Winged Wonder |
| Why do elephants were red nail polish?
to hide in cherry trees..have you seen elephant in a cherry tree lately? They must be doing good!
|
ak |
| How do you make an eggroll?
You push it!
|
yoyogirl |
| How do you make an eggroll?
You push it!
|
yoyogirl |
| Why did the boy need a lader for school?
because it was a high school
|
the yas joke |
| What did the red shirt say to the other red shirt. Nothing beause everybody knows shirts can not talk lol. |
Anayah |
| why cant you play dolls with a dragon?
because it might be barbie-qued ha ha ha
|
joker |
| What do you call a pig that knows karate?
A. Porkchop (Hah)
|
shorty324 |
question:what time of day can you spell the same backward and forward?
answer:noon |
hockey rocks |
Why did the king go to the dentist?
To get his teeth crowd |
den |
boy:i have been seeing spots for a
sometime
friend:did u ever see a doctor?
boy:nope just spots |
Guyanas Pride |
question:what starts witha T ends with a T and is full of T
answer:TEAPOT |
Dream Gurl |
| Which is the gate we can’t pass it ?
Colgate [tooth paste]
|
Athu |
where do lions get their clothes?
JUNGLE SALES |
funkeychic |
| why did the banana go to the doctors?
because he wasn’t peeling very well
|
liv |
| What comes early in the morning to brighten a mother’s day?
the school bus
|
Maarz |
Q: What do you call a sad berry?
A: A blue [sad] berry. |
Uyenny the Vu |
| How Can a hamburger run a mile???
because its fastfood!!!!!!!!!!!
|
K |
| what do you call a fly with no wings? a walk |
crazy acrubber |
| why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill ?
cause it ran out of juice ……
|
sick joke !! |
| What did the skeleton order for dinner… prime rib |
jutm |
what did the skeleton say before he ate?
boneapatete |
dragon breath |
| what do you call a snail on a ship?…… snailer |
dss |
| What do you call a deer with no eyes? ? ?
A No’I deer x x x
|
Danz’Babe x |
| What is the funniest bone…the trombone |
Elle |
What happens when you think in the shower?
Answer: BRAINWASH
xD |
anttubabii |
| What did the corner say to the other corner.
meet me half way. ha.ha.ha.ha
|
Mrz.carter |
Q:What has five fingers but is not a hand?
A:A glove! |
Danielle:) |
| what did frosty the snow man name his child when he married a vampire?
a:frostbite
|
cunfused |
| What do you call a fish with no eyes?
answer: FSH
|
woogie9 |
| How do you cut a sea in half?
With a Sea Saw !!!!!!!!!!!
|
FunnyBones3 |
| What Has 4 Legs & Can’t Walk?
A Chair
|
Maddie |
what kind of beans does draucula like
answer:a human beans |
nicky |
| Docter Docter I feel like a pig
How long have you been feeling like this?
For a weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekk
|
Monkey moomoo |
| Q. What do you get from a pampered cow?
A. Spoiled milk.
|
S.P&A.T |
| Q. Why did the tomato turn red?
A. It saw the salad dressing!
|
S.P&A.T |
| Q. Why did the birdie go to the hospital?
A. To get a tweetment.
|
S.P&A.T |
| what do you call a bear with no shoes? Bear foot. |
daniela |
| WHAT DO YOU CALL A BULL SLEEPING??
A BULLDOZER!!!
HEHEHE..
|
S |
| If the pink house has pink bricks,the black one has black bricks. What does the greenhouse have???
A: Glass
|
katekate |
| whats a lion favorite game?preystation |
flamzing |
how does a snow monster build his
house?a. iglue |
smily |
| what did the pumpkin say to his pesty little brother? cut it out |
honey |
| WHAT DID ONE PENNY SAY TO THE OTHER? LETS GET TOGETHER AND MAKE SOME CENTS. |
MARISSA |
| what do you call a millionair with no money ….a zerorownair |
lilly |
| Q.What do you call something red and goes up and down
A. A tomato in an elevator
|
shani |
| WHAT DO YOU CALL A HIPPO WHOS SLURPING NOODLES?A SLURPOPOTAMAS |
NOODLE SLURP |
what do you get if you cross spongebob with Albert einstein?
….spongebob smartypants!!!!!!!! |
matt |
| What do you call a fruit that is a genius? mangogenius |
mg |
| What do u call a train full of sweets?
A chew chew train
|
daz |
what do you give a tiger and a parrot combined?
any thing it wants |
adog |
| what animal is better then a counting dog??
a spelling bee!!!
|
Breezy!! |
| what do you call a bunny at the northpole ? LOST! |
pieman |
Where does Santa go on his vacation?
A Ho-Ho-Hotel |
Nick |
| Teacher: leona did you do your homework?
Leona:nope i didn’t
Teacher:That’s it young lady 25 minutes of detention
leona:i can’t get blamed for something i didn’t even do!
|
Shanial |
Where do cows get there medicine?
The farmacy |
Browniecake |
| why do people never listen to walnuts jokes? because there a-corny! |
ducky4536 |
| Why did the bee get married?
because she found her honey
|
sarai |
| what is the laziest mountain: mount everREST |
sarah |
Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
Because he wanted cold hard cash! |
chris |
Teacher : Sam! When was Rome built?
Sam : It was built during night.
Teacher : How can you say so?
Sam : Well,everyone knows that «Rome was not built in a day»… |
Rizwana |
| WHY WAS THE MATHS BOOK UPSET
{ because it had many problems ]
|
dolly |
Q:What is a snake’s favorite
subject?
A:Hisstory |
Adhu |
| Sir:James, why are you wearing cotton in your ears?
James:Beause you always say that when you say something it goes in from one ear and goes out from the other.
|
Rach |
| ally:are you smart
Billy:yes
Ally:spell it.
Billy:S-M-A-R-T
Ally:Nope I said spell IT.
|
berry10 |
What’s a minister’s favorite thing about a Televistion????)
the PRAYstation!!!
LOL— Top That! |
choPPer 97 |
| What did the alien say to the jigsaw puzzle? I come in piece and you come in pieces! |
Jman |
What happened to the monster who took the 5’o clock train home?
He had to bring it back! |
OHM |
| Why didn’t the two worms get on Noah’s ark in an apple?
Because they had to go in a pair!
|
Joseph Thomas Marchant from robin hood |
| Why did the monster eat the train?
Because it said choo-choo!
|
josh at elverta |
| How does money taste??
really really rich!!jajaja
|
joker |
What do you get wen you cross a duck with a cow?
Cheese and quakers! |
Ezra |
| mommy monster: I took my son to the zoo yesterday
second monster: did they keep him??
hahaha
|
monsters |
| mom: Sam stop pulling my hair.
Sam: I want my gum back!!
|
gum |
| Jennifer:Jake why is your sister so small??
Jake:she is my half sister!!
|
half |
WHY IS IT SO EASY TO FOOL A
VAMPIRE.
BECAUSE THERE
SUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!
|
YO MAMA 24 |
| what do you call frosty the snow man in summer?
a puddle
|
jj |
Q:what did the hot dog when it won the race?
A:I’M THE WEENER (WINNER) |
cheychey |
Which president is the biggest ham?
Abraham (Lincoln of course) |
Money |
What is a tree’s favorite trunk?
Root Beer |
Money |
Why is it too hot in a stadium after a football game?
all the fans have left |
Mani |
Why is a lost dalmation easily found?
because he’s always spotted! |
Mani |
| why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side |
paramorefan |
| Do you want to hear a construction joke?
I’m still working on it
|
jokey |
| what did the chef say to the mushroom?
You are a fun guy (fungi get it rotfl) lololololololol
|
pasta head |
| What do you get when you cross a fish and a cat? A prrrrrrrana get it hahahahha. |
TENA |
What kind or dance do you do on a trampoline?
(Hip-Hop!) |
Faith is wise |
| WHAT TYPE OF SWIMMING TECHNIQUE CAN’T YOU DO IN A KITTY POOL? THE DOGGY PADDLE! |
JJAY |
what do bees ride to school?
The school buzz. |
arkgirl |
| Q:WHAT IS A CATS’ FAVOURITE COLOUR?
A: PURRRRRRRRRRPLE
|
shishi |
| What is the biggest word in the world /smiles because there is a mile next to each s. |
yo |
What goes around the world and stays in a corner?
A Stamp |
unknown |
Q.Why did the tiger lose the race?
A.»cuz the other guy was a «cheetah»{cheater} |
Nikki |
| What did the Mummy monster say to the baby monster at lunch time?
Dont speak with someone in your mouth!
|
cheeky monkey |
| Q. what do you call two banna peals A. slippers |
dawg |
| Why does a Rhino have so many wrinkles?
Cause he’s hard to iron.
|
Skeeter |
| Q.What did one eye say to the other.
A.Something between us smells.
|
T-Baby |
| How do you start a teddy bear race
A. say ready teddy go!!!!
|
pinky |
| Q: What did the lions say before they ate dinner
A: Let us prey
|
xszsimszzx |
| What does a frog like to dance to?
HIP HOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
Flavor flav |
| me: hey sister mom wants you to help fix dinner. sister: why is it broken? |
sidthekid |
| who do you call when you hurt your toe…… a toe truck. |
dav |
| What did the tonsil say to the other tonsil? Get dressed the doctor is taken us out tonight |
pepperabby |
| Q:Why was the car so smelly. A:It had to much gas |
bugsbunny |
| Q what do you call two hands stuck together
A pom pom
|
Emily |
| Q: A butcher is 5 foot 2 inch what does he weigh?
A: meat
|
kim |
Q) why did Chris put his electric guitar in the freezer?
A) Coz he loved cool music! |
Lizz the showbizz |
| Why did mickey mouse shrink himself?
To be with Minnie
|
Karith CupCakith |
| why did the lady want wheels on her rocking chair ?
so she could rock and roll
|
h |
| Question:what do you call a snail in charge of a ship?
Answer:a snailer
|
brynny po |
| why did the tiger always lose relay races because the other guy was a terrible cheetah |
dudu |
| Q.what as 4 wheels and flies A. a garbge truck |
elizabeth |
WHAT GOES UP AND NEVER COME DOWN?
ANSWER:YOUR AGE |
KELLY |
| WHY DIDN’T THE MAN DIE WHEN HE DRANK THE POSITION?HE WAS IN THE LIVING ROOM. |
SASSYLOVESU |
| why did the spider go on his computer? Because he wanted to go on his website |
doggy |
| what do u call a monkey hanging on bars?
Monkey bars
|
bre babe |
| Where do superman’s goldfish live? In the superbowl. |
fishyperson |
| What is the tallest building?
The library cause it has most stories.
|
shining star |
| Q.What do you call two hands stuck to gether
.A Pom Pom
|
moo |
How do you fix a car in Scotland?
with scotch tape. |
Cutiepie16 |
How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste! |
moe |
When do you see the most frogs?
When it is froggy out. |
pesty |
| Q.When do you go on red and stop on green? A.When you’re eating a watermelon! |
t |
| what did superman’s monkey live in? a super cage |
natalli24946484 |
Q. What is the best way to catch a fish?
A. Have someone throw it at you. |
123a |
| What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep?
a wooly jumper!
|
monkeysrule said queenbadbananas |
| What do you get when you cross a chicken by a chicken?
Answer:a Chicken Dumpling!!!!
|
Nicole |
| What type of table doesn’t have any legs?
a multiplication table
|
baby101 |
| Q: What do you call a sad strawberry?
A:a Blue berry!
|
sad berry |
| What’s the dogs least favorite doggy bag?
a Fleabag!!!!
|
dragoon1223 |
| What do you call a fish with no i’s?
A Fsh!
|
fishy |
What do you do when you brake your big Toe??
Answer: Call a Big Toe Truck. Ha Ha |
Little Angie |
| What kind of dinosaur drinks tea? A T-Rex. |
Hailey110299 |
| Who is the person that arm-wrestlers don’t want to meet? Answer: Neil Armstrong |
cool6482 |
| What did a tornado say to the other tornado?
A.Twist you later!LOL!
|
Silly |
| What do basketballs and babies have in common. answer:THEY BOTH DRIBBLE |
darnelll |
| What has 4 legs a tail and is black and white?
A HORSE IN JAIL
|
right on |
| What type of room has nothing in it?
a mushroom
|
plack monster |
| What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
( milk & quackers)
|
Kasey |
| What do snowmen eat for cereal? frosted flakes |
bubble but 54 |
| What is Santa’s favorite candy? A jolly rancher |
gabe burch |
| What does the banana say to the other banana?
A.Keep you eye’s peeled
|
may-maycool |
How do you stop a lion from charging?
take away its credit cards!! |
rcky123 |
| How do you know when a dinosaur is under your bed?
your nose hits the ceiling
|
dinosaur |
| What do pigs get when they’re ill?
oinkment
|
piggys |
| Why did John walk backwards to school?
it was back to school day
|
school |
| How much money does a skunk have?
one scent
|
skunk |
| What do you get when you cross a giant with a skunk?
a big stink
|
giant and skunk |
| Why was cinderella not good at football?
Because she had a pumpkin as a coach
|
cinderella |
| What is the most tired part of your car?
the exhaust pipe
|
your car |
| How do you make a slow horse fast?
stop feeding it
|
horse |
| Why do fish swim in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze
|
fishies |
| What has four eyes but cant see?
Mississippi…lol
|
eyes |
| How do you make and egg roll?
push it
|
egg roll |
| What does a lazy dog chase?
parked cars..haha
|
lazy dog |
| What is a ghosts favorite food?
Anwser: BOO berrys!!Haha!
|
BOO!! |
| What do you get when you cross a snake and a book? Hisstory! |
jokertin86 |
Where did the football players fish live?
the SUPERBOWL!!! |
FISHYS |
| What does a snowman eat for breakfast? Snowflakes. |
Ashely101 |
| Why did the little boy put paper over the TV?
He was trying to make paper view.
|
Nabri |
| Why did the tomato turn red?
Because he saw the salad dressing!
|
Josie Gale |
| What did the stamp say to the envelope? Answer:Stick with me and we we’ll go places |
blank |
| question:how do you know you have an elephant under your bed?
answer:when your nose hits the ceiling.
|
poof |
| what do you feed a teddy bear? You can’t its already stuffed. |
teddy |
What do you find in a clean nose?
fingerprints |
speckles |
What are two banana peels together called?
A pair of slippers |
prango |
| Why did the bald guy put a rabbit on his head?
he needed hare
|
baldy |
| One night a boy was sleeping and dreaming about a marshmallow and when he woke up his pillow was gone!!!! |
Bubbles |
| Question: What do whales put on toast?
Answer: Blubber ( Instead of butter!)
|
Quaker |
Q: What is a bears favorite phone?
A: a blackberry! |
lol girl |
| WHY DO THEY CALL A TREX A TREX? BECAUSE IT’S SHAPED LIKE A T AND IT RECKS STUFF. |
TREX |
| What’s easy to get into, but hard to get out of?
Trouble.
|
Thika. |
question: what do you call a bear with no teeth?
your answer: A GUMMY BEAR!! |
yOuR hOME guRL! |
Q:What bird can you write with?
A:A PENguin. lol |
penguin gal |
| Have you heard the story of the germ?
Never mind, it’ll spread.
|
germex |
| Have you heard the one about the skunk?
Never mind, it really stinks.
|
smellz (good) |
| Q: What has 2 spines and millions of ribs?
A: Railroad
track
|
doglover |
| Who’s is the only super hero you can eat? Obi-wan canoli! |
spiderbird |
| Where do you wash a vampire? In the bat room |
mariam |
Q.Whats the difference between a fly and a bird.
A.a bird can fly but a fly can’t bird. |
Bree |
WHEN DO DUCKS WAKE UP?
THE QUACK OF DAWN!!!! |
WILLIA |
Why was sally’s horse called ink?
because he kept running out of the pen! |
411girl |
| Q: What did one eye say to the other?
A: Something stinks in between us!
|
joker |
(This did NOT happen to me)
A girl texted: What does IDK mean?
ME: I don’t know
GIRL: OMG!!! No one else does, either! |
crazychick |
| Why did the jellybean go to school
Because he wanted to be a smartie
|
smiley |
| Q.What has 4 wheels and flies? A.A garbage truck |
EE |
Q)why dont you do homework in the jungle?
A)because if you add 4+4 you get ATE!!! hahaha!!! |
skyress14 |
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
because it had a virus! |
Mz.britbrit |
| What’s the meanest type of shoe?
Pumas
|
bever |
| M: How’s my son doing in your class?
T: He surprises me at least once a month!
M: In what way?
T: Once a month he can answer me correctly!
|
princess jokes |
| What did the scarf say to the hat? You keep an eye up there and I’ll hang around here!!! |
Jaye-Louise Hall |
| Why was the math book sad? because it has to many problems! |
math |
What do you call a baby partial?
A:Adam |
mini |
Q: What kind of animal should you never play cards with
A: A Cheetah!!!!:) |
cuty pie 427 |
| What do you have when you have 7 oranges in your right hand and 5 in the other hand?
answer- big hands
|
twinky |
| WHAT DO YOU FEED TEDDY BEARS?
ANSWER: STUFFING (like at thanksgiving)
|
H2O TO THEEE MAX !! |
| What did the plant do in math class?
Answer: It grew square roots!
|
killer |
whats the best thing to put on a pie?
your teeth! |
bu bu |
| Why does vampires brush their teeth?
To stop bat breath.
|
eee! |
| When do ghosts play tricks on each other?
on April ghouls day.
|
tut! tut! tut! tut! |
| Where do abominable snowman go to dance?
To snowballs.
|
yeh! |
| What should a short sighted ghost have?
spooktacles!
|
really! |
| What should a short sighted ghost have? spooktacles! |
Ell |
| why did Mickey mouse go to outer space? Because he wanted to see pluto |
karlin twiss My real name . |
| Why was the skeleton laughing?
because of it’s funny bone
|
cookie |
| Q: What has a head, a tail, and no body?
A: A coin!
|
quackster |
| Why did the cookie go to the docter?
Because it felt crummy!!!
|
abay bay |
Why do some football players never sweat?
because of all there fans! |
fashion is my middle name |
| Where does the EASTER BUNNY go to eat breakfast?
at IHOP
|
paul derfus!!! |
| Joker: Wanna hear a construction joke?
Person: Sure, I’d love to hear a construction joke!
Joker: Sorry, I’m still working on it!
Person: Ha, ha, ha!!!!!!
|
lisa2208 |
Q: What time should a person go at the dentist?
A: At TOOTH-THIRTY!!! |
sweetangel_99 |
Why did the house go to the doctor?
Because he had window panes!!! |
angel |
| Why did the monkey say to his little brother?
you’re driving me bananas!
|
tator top |
Whats the difference between a teacher and a
train. the teacher says spit out your gum and
the train says chew chew chew. |
nubero |
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
because he lost his filling |
tor |
What animal needs to wear a wig?
a bald eagle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
T.T. |
WHERE CAN YOU FIND AN OCEAN WITH NO WATER?
ON A MAP |
SPUX |
| What is round as a cookie, busy as a bee? What can it be?
A watch
|
cutie pie |
| What does an elf learn in school?
answer- the elfabet
|
mnm |
| Q: What did the blanket say to the bed?
A: Don’t worry Ive got you covered!
|
DevonSlapBill |
| Q. What do bunnies like to play?
A. hop scotch
|
ABC |
| teacher: Name two animals that live in a cold region?
student: A polar bear and his wife
|
bitya |
| Why did the egg go to the doctors?
Because he had a cracking headache.ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
tybo |
| Q: Where does a rabbit learn how to fly?
A: in the hare force.
|
k.k. |
| Why did the grasshopper go to the doctor?
because he felt jumpy.
|
shelly |
| What kind of trick can a bunny do on a BMX bike?
Answer: A BUNNY HOP
|
audrey |
| Why did the kid sleep with a ruler?
To measure how long he slept!
|
socks |
| Q:What is a witches favorite part in school?
A:Spelling LOL!!!
|
kristy |
| Q.Why was Rita carrying a ladder?
A.Because she was going to high school!
|
becky |
What did the math book say to the other math book?
Boy do I have problems. |
Ginger |
| Q: Why did the boy take a pencil to bed?
A: to draw the curtains!
|
bullet |
| Why is a horse like a wedding?
Because they both need a GROOM!!!
|
Brooke |
| Why is a horse like a wedding
Because they both need a groom!!!!!!!!!!
|
BECKBOO |
| Q. What has four legs but can’t walk?
A. a chair!!!!!!!!!!!
|
CASSY!X!X!X!X! |
| Q. What do you call a sheep that is covered in chocolate?
A. A Hershey baaaaaar!
|
Hana |
Q. What lies at the bottom of the sea and
shakes?
A. A nervous shipwreck!
|
ollie |
| Q:why did the sheep go to the movies
A: to get some snaaahcks
|
spidermonkey5 |
| Q:How do you make a fruit punch?
A:Give it boxing lessons.
|
Kyran |
Q: What’s black and white and makes a lot of noise?
A: A zebra with a drumkit. |
jay |
Q. why did the elephant paint himself diffrent colours
A. so he could hide in the crayon box |
doll |
| What dog can jump higher than a building?
Anydog, buildings can’t jump!
|
Katy |